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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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jes23

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jes23
  • Town/Country : missisauga, canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 November 1996 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 919
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jes23 : nothing to say here just to say i'm gonna make some grammar mistakes so you grammar police back off
oh yeah i'm actualy 11 years old

jes23's last visitors

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jes23's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jes23's favorite FMLs

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

#9184901 (388)

I agree, your life sucks (42938) - you deserved it (4389)

On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

#9161234 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (25229) - you deserved it (2564)

On 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML

#9081770 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (20229) - you deserved it (1279)

On 03/14/2010 at 7:23pm - animals - by OhhhNooo (man) - United States (California)

Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

#8966717 (240)

I agree, your life sucks (7869) - you deserved it (15581)

On 03/10/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by ohno - United States

Today, my 18 year old daughter comes home telling me she has been fired from her job at McDonalds. The reason? They had ICarly happy meal toys and she couldn't resist stealing one. FML

#8838699 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (18112) - you deserved it (3487)

On 03/05/2010 at 1:10am - kids - by icarlymom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561 (490)

I agree, your life sucks (4712) - you deserved it (36905)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to clean out my room because I was having a sleepover. Only, I've not been in here for months since I've spent every night in my mom's room because I'm too scared to sleep alone. FML

#8719119 (200)

I agree, your life sucks (4305) - you deserved it (17384)

On 02/28/2010 at 1:57pm - misc - by apple (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while I was standing in the elevator with a few people I just met when I moved in yesterday, I felt something fall on my hair and dusted it off. It was a cockroach. None of them will come within a 1m distance to me now, because they all think I've got lice. Welcome to the building! FML

I agree, your life sucks (13892) - you deserved it (1211)

On 02/28/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by idonthavelice (woman) - China (Guangdong)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (19068)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got into my boyfriends car having to pee really badly. I accidentally peed everywhere. He kicked me out. I had to walk four miles home in 20 degree weather. In wet clothes. FML

#8592124 (363)

I agree, your life sucks (8712) - you deserved it (26438)

On 02/23/2010 at 5:10pm - misc - by whyme_ss - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML

#8553099 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (18274) - you deserved it (1740)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:11pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

#8519094 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (3469) - you deserved it (29643)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by anna14 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at the supermarket, I ignored the "Riding on trolleys down the ramp is strictly prohibited" sign. While going full speed down the ramp, my trolley with $200 worth of groceries in it tipped and crashed. Luckily, I broke its fall. FML

#8509924 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (2607) - you deserved it (26506)

On 02/21/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I got stuck in my apartment's garbage chute. FML

#8492121 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (6971) - you deserved it (17878)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by AwwChute (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

#8488357 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (21314) - you deserved it (2470)

On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)