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jerryj

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jerryj

16Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5576
  • Number of comments : 402
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jerryj : o hai there...
BANANA BREAD!

jerryj's page activity

Visits<b>lumene</b> - 6 hours ago<b>ZoeeeGuyss</b> - 10 hours ago<b>mrloweco</b> - yesterday at 10:18am<b>PMAN6x7</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 5:43pm<b>Jas67</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 5:37pm<b>swagalicous</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 5:19pm<b>shea627</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 4:26pm<b>kcrulez</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:43pm<b>Arkajion</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:45pm<b>Blackash_123</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:19pm<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 9:33am<b>haasje2000</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:16am<b>dettesuger</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 4:32am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 10:49am<b>kaseyyeahh</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 12:18pm<b>tina326</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:55am<b>HighasaCloud</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 10:34pm<b>CareBearBae</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 7:53am

Fucked!<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:15am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:02am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:53am<b>DanyilK</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 8:13am<b>lolbjarne</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 7:14pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 1:39pm<b>jquaw</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 8:28am<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:53am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:40am<b>itsme82</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 11:18pm<b>666lolita666</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 10:27am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:47pm<b>xsydneyx123</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 2:33pm<b>odamaliekh</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:54am<b>kayana153</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:30pm

jerryj's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of jerryj's badges

jerryj's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

#21414219
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21222) - you deserved it (2123)

On 05/22/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by Kurda (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was fired for not asking a senior citizen for proof that he was over 21 and legally allowed to purchase alcohol. When I told my manager he was clearly over 21, he replied, "But what if he WASN'T?" FML

#21412440
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28816) - you deserved it (3059)

On 05/19/2015 at 7:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML

#21410715
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27319) - you deserved it (2352)

On 05/15/2015 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out my wife confided in a coworker that she wants to sleep with him, because our marriage is loveless and sexless. News to me. FML

#21410043
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29079) - you deserved it (2652)

On 05/14/2015 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by semokco (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

#21408368
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26492) - you deserved it (8685)

On 05/11/2015 at 12:40pm - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was talking to a cute guy at my house party and had to fart. Luckily, it was silent. Unluckily, he smelled it, thought my house had a gas leak, and ran to the basement to check the pipes and ensure our safety. FML

#21404933
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26385) - you deserved it (5500)

On 05/05/2015 at 1:41am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my roommate was making a waterproof iPhone case and decided to use my phone to test it out. It didn't work. FML

#21402720
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29663) - you deserved it (3425)

On 05/01/2015 at 1:30am - misc - by Crombinator - United States (Oregon)

Today, a cute, new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML

#21399135
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26643) - you deserved it (3394)

On 04/24/2015 at 5:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML

#21398988
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27911) - you deserved it (5526)

On 04/24/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41342) - you deserved it (2821)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I started getting really bad chest pains at work. I googled it and the internet convinced me I was having a heart attack. Scared for my life, I started to dial for an ambulance when I let out the biggest fart you could ever imagine. Turns out it was trapped gas. FML

#21397265
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26067) - you deserved it (9461)

On 04/21/2015 at 3:55am - health - by Not dying. (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML

#21395300
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28713) - you deserved it (3414)

On 04/17/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35408) - you deserved it (2354)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)



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