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jerryj

Offline (yesterday at 7:24pm) | Search for a member

jerryj

24Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7784
  • Number of comments : 461
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jerryj : o hai there...
BANANA BREAD!

jerryj's page activity

Visits<b>caaxo</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 10:17am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 6:29am<b>MamaChey</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:49pm<b>BI4ze</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:47am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:30am<b>jitterbug1503</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 11:33pm<b>msk1155</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:46pm<b>tj1540</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 7:35pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:08am<b>couchcat</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:26am<b>plastix</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 7:44am<b>ForeignKestrel</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 10:05am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 2:54pm<b>deathstroke990</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 9:30pm<b>saffy66</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 5:33am<b>Fritz_Rfunny1</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 7:44am<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 7:11pm<b>EnigmaticSoul</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 8:07pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 9:30pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 2:56am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:44am<b>Zufallian</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:00am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 6:35pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:53pm<b>Amateur_Dank</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:33am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:15am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:02am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:53am<b>DanyilK</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 8:13am<b>lolbjarne</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 7:14pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 1:39pm<b>jquaw</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 8:28am<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:53am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:40am<b>itsme82</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 11:18pm<b>666lolita666</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 10:27am

jerryj's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of jerryj's badges

jerryj's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was taking a shit, a guy went into the next stall and narrated what he was doing in song. I'm still traumatized by his lyrics. FML

#21522585
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18212) - you deserved it (1420)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:13pm - misc - by Lord_Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my son wanted to be Spiderman. He found the biggest spider he could outside and let it bite his hand. He's staying overnight in the hospital. FML

#21522558
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20371) - you deserved it (1912)

On 02/03/2016 at 9:04pm - kids - by Spooderman (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

#21522398
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23538) - you deserved it (3329)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:40am - intimacy - by :x (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

#21521379
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22631) - you deserved it (4990)

On 01/31/2016 at 4:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I was there with the lights out when something ran across my foot. I freaked out, tried to kick it off, and ended up smashing my foot into the side of the tub. FML

#21520448
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18644) - you deserved it (2801)

On 01/28/2016 at 3:24pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML

#21520383
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20869) - you deserved it (1210)

On 01/28/2016 at 11:05am - misc - by crinitis - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after weeks of watching Michael Jackson videos non-stop, my boyfriend learned how to moonwalk. Now he does it literally everywhere. I can't even cross the street without him moonwalking behind me. FML

#21520184
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18568) - you deserved it (2637)

On 01/27/2016 at 7:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I were goofing off playing tag behind the local church, when I heard a banshee-like wail behind me. Assuming it was one of my friends, I wailed right back and ran. Turned out there was actually a funeral going on, and the wail was from one of the bereaved. FML

#21520005
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (7032)

On 01/27/2016 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a customer scared me for the sole purpose of watching my breasts jiggle when I jumped in surprise. I know because his head moved as they did, and he said, "Nice." before walking away. FML

#21519950
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20585) - you deserved it (1828)

On 01/27/2016 at 2:59am - work - by NotYourToy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML

#21519668
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19705) - you deserved it (1463)

On 01/26/2016 at 1:09pm - kids - by justsomesummer (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned the hard way what the inside of my toe looks like. FML

Today, my dad and uncle got in an argument over money and ended up fighting in the back garden. Only, my dad is a muay thai fighter and my uncle is an MMA fighter, and they're refusing to stop until one of them is out cold. I foresee me driving them both to the hospital before midnight. FML

#21516668
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20058) - you deserved it (1285)

On 01/18/2016 at 5:29pm - misc - by enya (woman) - Luxembourg

Today, my fiancée was asleep, so I decided to spoon her from behind and cup her boobs to wake her up nicely. She responded by yelling, "THE TOAST!" and elbowing me in the face whilst still asleep. FML

Today, after months of trying to train my cockatiel to perch on my finger, he finally trusted me enough to fly from his cage and land on my hand. I panicked and accidentally backhanded him across the room. FML

#21514709
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16616) - you deserved it (17660)

On 01/13/2016 at 12:05pm - animals - by parasheeeet (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML



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