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jerryj

Offline (the 04/04/2014 at 5:57pm) | Search for a member

jerryj

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1288
  • Number of comments : 234
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jerryj : o hai there...
BANANA BREAD!

jerryj's page activity

Visits<b>CODplayer4lyfe</b> - one hour ago<b>mamm</b> - 2 hours ago<b>football98</b> - yesterday at 6:14pm<b>seemetrot</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:11am<b>Kranksinnige</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 12:28am<b>juanschwartz</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:05am<b>Ethan4an</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:14pm<b>Tommypun</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:15pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:25pm<b>LordDoodle</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Aaliyahxo14</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:03pm<b>farleytb42</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:01am<b>whitneynwest</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:56pm<b>riptor911</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 10:19pm<b>asmb100</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:29pm<b>lexa1love</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:27pm<b>snackfood0</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:18pm<b>tesslaar</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:55pm

jerryj's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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jerryj's favorite FMLs

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive, nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

#21220137
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4061) - you deserved it (7179)

On 07/25/2014 at 8:05am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)

Today, the fire alarm went off at work. My office is on the second floor, and the door to the stairs were jammed shut. The only way out was jumping out the window. The best part was breaking my leg due to someone burning their lunch. FML

#21218720
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29700) - you deserved it (5664)

On 07/23/2014 at 9:34pm - health - by timv94 (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28918) - you deserved it (9310)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

#21214127
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27381) - you deserved it (35823)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a customer write "fuck you" in the tip option area on his credit card slip, I have no idea why. FML

#21212818
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34394) - you deserved it (4594)

On 07/18/2014 at 11:49am - work - by tuck87 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

#21211411
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48841) - you deserved it (4152)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm - misc - by Is that..? - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42708) - you deserved it (5080)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML

#21208109
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44747) - you deserved it (3729)

On 07/13/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by all puked out (man) - Netherlands

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42323) - you deserved it (7873)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

#21206177
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39387) - you deserved it (6073)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm - health - by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML

#21203602
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37093) - you deserved it (17462)

On 07/09/2014 at 1:38am - kids - by whoops - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML

#21203542
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41854) - you deserved it (3369)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:24am - work - by HowAreYouAlive - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

#21203004
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39213) - you deserved it (4830)

On 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm - animals - by Jack00412 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41015) - you deserved it (2990)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40525) - you deserved it (4018)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom



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