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jeragonm

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jeragonm

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  • Number of visits : 4294
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Visits<b>Linksavestheday</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 9:59am<b>JazNim17</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 10:51am<b>singer0421</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:25pm<b>RandomPenguin</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:37pm<b>Thedudebroman</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:13am<b>cryptic26</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 7:31pm<b>Zomg_Okay</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 5:52pm<b>tj4234</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 9:09am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 06/03/2012 at 5:33pm

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jeragonm's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a massage. I guess I hit the spot, because he muttered, "Please marry me" into the pillow. Considering we've been going out for years and had spoken about marriage before, I stopped in my tracks. He stammered, "Oh, I mean... Not like that. Will you keep going?" FML

#21272255
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35236) - you deserved it (3646)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML

#21272098
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39893) - you deserved it (3882)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:46pm - love - by kittenfish8903 (woman) - United States

Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML

#21271972
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36071) - you deserved it (4386)

On 10/06/2014 at 11:05am - work - by theseguysarewhipped... - Canada (Ontario)

Today, was the day I would turn my life around and start losing weight. I went outside for my first run and said, "I got this!" I confidently stepped forward, the first symbolic steps to my new life. In the anticipation, I forgot my porch had steps. I face-planted on my driveway. FML

#21271662
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36349) - you deserved it (7248)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:17pm - health - by PickYourselfUp (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35924) - you deserved it (16044)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML

#21271461
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42962) - you deserved it (2505)

On 10/05/2014 at 7:30pm - animals - by FML - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

#21271187
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34872) - you deserved it (3456)

On 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, at age 31, I was about to finally lose my virginity. As we tumbled onto the bed, an excruciating pain shot through my stomach. It turned out to be a hernia, and no, I didn't get laid in the end. FML

#21271185
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36793) - you deserved it (3320)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:55am - intimacy - by fucksake (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42256) - you deserved it (5123)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41182) - you deserved it (8643)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, claiming I'd threatened him with a gun. Despite zero proof, they took me to the station and gave me hell. I guess what I've learned today is that you should never offend your crazy neighbor by breaking up with his daughter. FML

#21270631
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38009) - you deserved it (3878)

On 10/04/2014 at 12:31pm - misc - by runsinthefamily (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and head butted me. Now there is just an awkward silence. FML

#21270556
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32823) - you deserved it (3857)

On 10/04/2014 at 8:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a quickie in the car. We had left a window open so it wasn't too hot, and I was holding onto the edge of the window, fingers hanging over. In the midst of it all, my boyfriend managed to close the window by hitting the button. My finger is broken. FML

#21270463
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33349) - you deserved it (9657)

On 10/04/2014 at 1:43am - intimacy - by manymisfortunes - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

#21270394
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35727) - you deserved it (4214)

On 10/03/2014 at 11:08pm - health - by Disappointed -

Today, I told my mom that once I leave school, I want to join the clergy, and how much it meant to me. Her response: "Never knew you wanted to molest kids so much!" FML

#21270314
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29916) - you deserved it (6334)

On 10/03/2014 at 9:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)



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