Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 April 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 94
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jennymac49 : Nursing student. 21. Living life to the fullest.

jennymac49's page activity

Visits<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:04am<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 2:28am<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 10:37pm

jennymac49's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of jennymac49's badges

jennymac49's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom baked a cake for the whole family. One spent EpiPen later, I found out there were nuts in it, which I'm severely allergic to. My mom's defense was that she thought I'd have "gotten over" my allergy by now. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47881) - you deserved it (2926)

On 11/16/2013 at 4:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw on my 17-year-old daughter's floor her "To-Do" list. What was #1? Jump in front of a moving vehicle, in hopes that Edward Cullen will use his vampire speed to save her. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32372) - you deserved it (3954)

On 10/04/2012 at 10:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24982) - you deserved it (2510)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:07am - health - by Leashaness (woman) - United States

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41219) - you deserved it (4375)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (5125)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States

Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (8345) - you deserved it (69730)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:41am - misc - by pissfaced (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML


I agree, your life sucks (10652) - you deserved it (22190)

On 12/29/2009 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by queen (woman) - Brazil (Minas Gerais)

Scarlatine's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Scarlatine's illustrated FML
  • Are your abs well-toned and look like you’re made of metal? Feel like a machine ready to take whatever the crossfit fad can throw at you? Do you scream, ”Bro, do you Even lift?" at people during…

Monday 5 October 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: