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jennifertheasian

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jennifertheasian

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  • Number of visits : 24
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jennifertheasian's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackas in an open-top sport car overtook us an flippd me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife looool rolld down her window, pulld out her tampon, an launchd it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrifid: me or him. FML

#19793582
405 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37400) - you deserved it (4026)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written ( Obama is a beautiful chocolate man ) to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11918) - you deserved it (89087)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

TODAY, I STARTED PETTING MAH COUSIN'S DOBERMAN. NOW, WHENEVER I STOP HE GROWLS MENACINGLY. FML

#16166972
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28572) - you deserved it (4888)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking!! He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted!! FML

#15748072
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29338) - you deserved it (2947)

On 04/11/2011 at 11:07pm - health - by ILiveWithMorons (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today , I went to a haunted show restaurant. I needed the toilet badly , but they were inside the building , which could only be gotten to via a ghost train. The footage of me peeing myself in terror on the train was played on a big screen inside , in front of a crowd of onlookers. real FML

#15039071
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28256) - you deserved it (4575)

On 02/19/2011 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My grlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retractd high-five. Then I panickd, cuppd his fist and ran. FML

#13986029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12009) - you deserved it (27634)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, I ad to take a dump . Wile looking for a book to read, I sneezd . Te force of te sneeze causd me to sit my pants . Te glob of dung ten ran down my leg before falling out of my sort onto my carpet, all in less tan 5 seconds . Noting in my life as prepard me for tis . FML

#5828114
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88167) - you deserved it (14713)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today... I was at tha laka watching a romantic sunsat with my boyfriand. Ha tandarly startad touching my thigh... than startad shaking my lag to tha rhythmhila singing tha J-E-L-L-O thama song. FML

#4570471
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45908) - you deserved it (7490)

On 08/16/2009 at 10:32am - intimacy - by juliaspaperbags (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was giving a presentation to a group of high school kids about how being 'cool' wasn't as important as they might think!! When I was done I asked fir questions!! A kid says, "Miss, I get that your not into being cool, but your wearing your pants inside out.' He was right!! FML

#1148346
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41879) - you deserved it (23670)

On 04/20/2009 at 8:21am - misc - by indi1011 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Yesterday, mom told boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to master bait in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chair and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if mom was there to make me stop. fat FML

#280083
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (143565) - you deserved it (16015)

On 03/12/2009 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

at tha dantist... I was gatting my taath claanad. Looking up at his nosa... I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I triad to slowly mova away. Ha told ma ( Stop! ) Tha movamant of his lips causad tha snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

#217348
421 comments

I agree, your life sucks (498873) - you deserved it (48481)

On 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)



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