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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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jennam

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jennam
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 October 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 10746
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jennam : I'm Jenna, obviously.

jennam's last visitors

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jennam's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

#14973308 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (28345) - you deserved it (3167)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML

#14925146 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (24549) - you deserved it (3107)

On 02/10/2011 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks (14638) - you deserved it (8253)

On 02/10/2011 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I logged onto a website that offered free tutoring. After chatting with the online tutor, he started flirting with me. I was just looking for some help with my homework, not a creeper. FML

I agree, your life sucks (17550) - you deserved it (4111)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Chasity (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend left for a 2-year job posting in China. We had agreed to maintain a long distance relationship and even worked out a visiting schedule. Later that night, after trying to reach him, I realized the numbers he gave me weren't for China. The country code doesn't even exist. FML

I agree, your life sucks (24002) - you deserved it (2178)

On 02/06/2011 at 7:58pm - love - by dumbass -

Today, I found out that my mom screams like a dying monkey while having sex. Even with my music turned up all the way, I can still hear her through our paper thin walls. FML

#14867901 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (27116) - you deserved it (2188)

On 02/06/2011 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

#2925389 (297)

I agree, your life sucks (64268) - you deserved it (3598)

On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML

I agree, your life sucks (37122) - you deserved it (2083)

On 06/15/2009 at 6:07am - animals - by Tom (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML

#2738282 (307)

I agree, your life sucks (84970) - you deserved it (2927)

On 06/09/2009 at 9:36am - intimacy - by SleepyKirsty (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML

Today, I found some oversized-strawberry-spree candies in my pantry. They were delicious and I munched on them through out the day. I ended up in and out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonders and effectiveness of Fruit Flavored Fiber pills. FML

I agree, your life sucks (9446) - you deserved it (30784)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:14am - health - by KKimrae_ness (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608 (463)

I agree, your life sucks (30232) - you deserved it (98428)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)



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