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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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jellyrcw11

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jellyrcw11
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 477
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jellyrcw11's favorite FMLs

Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#17390197 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (12021) - you deserved it (995)

On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811 (307)

I agree, your life sucks (32681) - you deserved it (4560)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

#15619603 (332)

I agree, your life sucks (58552) - you deserved it (4293)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They put a new monkey cage in my designated spot. I was literally fired so a monkey could take my place. FML

#15445630 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (27574) - you deserved it (3475)

On 03/23/2011 at 7:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

#15296176 (294)

I agree, your life sucks (9381) - you deserved it (48234)

On 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my coworker returned the camera I lent her. After plugging the camera into my PC, I saw a file was still on it. Wanting to make sure I didn't delete something important, I opened it. To my horror, it was a video of my coworker pleasuring herself. She's old enough to be my mother. FML

#15207126 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (17679) - you deserved it (3680)

On 03/05/2011 at 2:57pm - intimacy - by Traumatized (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (41634) - you deserved it (3254) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML

#15165493 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (9867) - you deserved it (26215)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:18pm - health - by Baileyy - United States

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (6128)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781 (275)

I agree, your life sucks (36709) - you deserved it (2785) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, while at my boyfriends place, I thought I would be nice by folding his laundry and putting it away since he was working late. I opened his sock drawer and sitting on top was a photo of his mother, naked. FML

#14753081 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (42119) - you deserved it (3082)

On 01/29/2011 at 1:55am - intimacy - by FamilySecret - United States

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I sit next to wafting the smell of their vagina towards themselves and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (31510) - you deserved it (2472)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I tried to fix my laptop charger by fiddling around with it using metal tweezers. Not only did I forget to unplug the cord and shocked myself, I also ended up breaking the charger completely. FML

#14044782 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (3460) - you deserved it (30753)

On 12/01/2010 at 3:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then 'All By Myself' came on the radio. FML

#14040843 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (23018) - you deserved it (2156)

On 11/30/2010 at 9:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Italy

Today, finishing up in the shower room, I walked into the kitchen to get a drink. Apparently both bathrooms were occupied and my grandmother really had to go... She was bent over in the kitchen peeing into a cup. I may never be able to erase this image. FML

#13496541 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (18385) - you deserved it (1454)

On 10/18/2010 at 7:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)