About jellitonoctopus : Hey! Thanks for stopping by.
I like:
The Legend of Zelda
Pokémon
Final Fantasy
Tales of Vesperia
Animal Crossing
Nintendo
Xbox
Opossums
Salamanders
Beatles and other cute insects
Ocean life
Dental hygiene/ care
&YOU!
I dislike:
Weather that is hot and humid at the same time
People who mistake Link as Zelda
Dry skin
Eggplant
Pumpkin
Centipedes
& dust.
I usually browse FML on my iPhone, but feel free to message me. I do check my messages when I use my laptop.
BYE!!! :)
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12732) - you deserved it (3134)
Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity". I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18368) - you deserved it (1978)
On 01/26/2012 at 9:49am - love - by The Towel Molester (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were doll heads and cigarette butts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22502) - you deserved it (1518)
On 01/24/2012 at 11:51pm - misc - by JellitonOctopus - United States (California)
Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were doll heads and cigarette butts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22502) - you deserved it (1518)
On 01/24/2012 at 11:51pm - misc - by JellitonOctopus - United States (California)
Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23894) - you deserved it (1796)
On 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7381) - you deserved it (21111)
On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, it's my birthday. The only thing I got was a coupon for a couples acupuncture session from my sister. I'm single and have an extreme fear of needles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20180) - you deserved it (1623)
On 01/23/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by michellenKG (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to send a picture of my Grandma at her funeral to my girlfriend, because she thought I was out cheating on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28943) - you deserved it (4602)
On 01/22/2012 at 7:31pm - love - by Jeff G. - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I'm so broke that when I got out of the shower, I had to slowly dry myself off with a ShamWow sample I received in the mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23626) - you deserved it (3531)
On 01/21/2012 at 3:38pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to get a nice, relaxing hot stone massage. Instead I got second degree burns on my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19551) - you deserved it (2593)
On 01/21/2012 at 9:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know..." and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19870) - you deserved it (1292)
On 01/20/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by shellski (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was at Disneyland with a friend. We were watching the light show, and when Tinkerbell came out, we both started crying. Some guy noticed and called us "fucking pussies". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7597) - you deserved it (29207)
On 01/20/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by sharky (woman) - United States (California)
Today, like every other day, my boss referred to my breasts as pillows he needs to nap on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26373) - you deserved it (3275)
On 01/20/2012 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Emily27 (woman) - United Kingdom (East Lothian)
Today, I had to explain to my husband why putting on dirty underwear after a shower defeats the purpose. We had this discussion in the middle of me giving him head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20660) - you deserved it (6114)
On 01/20/2012 at 12:02am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25434) - you deserved it (2538)
On 01/19/2012 at 12:14am - health - by hurts.to.pee - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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