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jedidesauden's FML badges
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jedidesauden's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML
by Rissa Warrington / 03/09/2012 at 3:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by Kayla_Zee_Ninja / 03/07/2012 at 11:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Janitor / 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm / United States (Utah) / Work
by sad face / 03/07/2012 at 2:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I approached the girl I like, hoping to ask her out. Just as I strode up to her, she excused herself as quickly as she could. I then realized I'd forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the bathroom minutes before. FML
by Tommy / 03/06/2012 at 1:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by biggirlsdocry / 03/06/2012 at 8:56am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by LittleRed / 03/05/2012 at 3:45am / United States / Intimacy
by wtbfiber / 03/05/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 03/04/2012 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I went to a Mexican restaurant with my family. I got stuck trying to decide whether I should get the fajitas or the tacos. I ended up getting the tacos because I didn't want the fajitas to come in sizzling, and I didn't want to "make a scene". My social anxiety has hit a new low. FML
by mexicandelicacy / 03/03/2012 at 10:09pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/02/2012 at 10:54am / United States / Health
by iVaughtTV / 02/28/2012 at 5:44pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
by kal / 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/26/2012 at 4:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of…
- Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the… Today, due to a spate of burglaries, I updated the security on my house. Latches, locks, gates, I…