About jeanniebabee : people would say im somewhat of a goof'
i love to just make life worth living with a couple of jokes.
im mexican & cuban.
i like everything that has to do with beauty, make-up & such.
-> wanna get to know me message me here.
or on my yahoo.
contreras_jeannette@yahoo.com
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I walked into my bathroom to find my girlfriend applying my deodorant. This would have been fine, if she wasn't applying it to her mouth. I don't think deodorant helps with bad breath, but a quick Google search shows that it does help with herpes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33920) - you deserved it (2172)
On 12/13/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by neednewdeoderant - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41109) - you deserved it (5777)
On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40307) - you deserved it (2612)
On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, our Christmas tree was damaged beyond repair after my son and his friends borrowed it for a little experiment. They tied balloons to the branches and tried to make it fly, after seeing a similar video online. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15709) - you deserved it (2216)
On 12/09/2011 at 1:44pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35451) - you deserved it (625)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23212) - you deserved it (2618)
On 12/08/2011 at 5:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25480) - you deserved it (3918)
On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29061) - you deserved it (13416)
On 12/07/2011 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was excited about being set up on a blind date by one of my new co-workers. It turns out the guy she thought would be a "totally perfect match" for me is the ex who cheated on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29592) - you deserved it (2852)
On 04/04/2011 at 6:15am - love - by lonely (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, there were a few loud and annoying kids running around my store. My coworker and I started talking and I jokingly stated "Yeah, kids ruin everything." But before I could get out "God knows I'm not ready to be a dad," my phone rang. It was my one night stand. I'm going to be a daddy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9707) - you deserved it (51514)
On 09/24/2010 at 7:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54690) - you deserved it (12530)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (50692) - you deserved it (9078)
On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (181911) - you deserved it (25550)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (314061) - you deserved it (41271)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18264) - you deserved it (3280)
On 01/20/2009 at 3:00pm - love - by pikachu - United States (Virginia)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
