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jdkfgkjdfb

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26953
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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jdkfgkjdfb's page activity

Visits<b>obnum</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:21pm<b>conman1198</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:39pm<b>cartoonboy</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:23am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:41pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/08/2009 at 11:17pm<b>ihateharrypotter</b> - the 08/23/2009 at 1:12am<b>GtaTomV</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 12:30pm<b>mrfitzpatrick</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 11:02pm<b>mari0958</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 4:09pm<b>kindmoby</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 4:26am<b>epic_name</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 3:33am<b>BUTitsBROKEN</b> - the 06/25/2009 at 9:13pm<b>blue16</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 10:24am<b>pyromaniac239</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 11:57am<b>donnieandalicia</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 5:20pm<b>jmud</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 9:04pm<b>miltonbradley</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 11:39pm<b>bsw001</b> - the 05/16/2009 at 10:46am

jdkfgkjdfb's FML badges

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jdkfgkjdfb's favorite FMLs

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

#1711398
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51051) - you deserved it (4252)

On 05/07/2009 at 3:40am - misc - by mikesok988 (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the 2nd grade. FML

#1706797
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71549) - you deserved it (8074)

On 05/06/2009 at 11:47pm - kids - by fmal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML

#1704585
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61939) - you deserved it (2692)

On 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm - misc - by Gumfanatic302 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my blind friend bragged to a group of people that she knew all of us by smell. We all took turns standing in front of her, and she would tell us who we were. When I got in front of her, she thought I was my dog. FML

#1086654
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46485) - you deserved it (9159)

On 04/18/2009 at 2:09pm - animals - by Spec (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

#661322
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66812) - you deserved it (35323)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by Chelsea (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

#495475
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56158) - you deserved it (29217)

On 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm - misc - by cjj325 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71570) - you deserved it (16556)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my roommate got mad at me for putting away the tampons that were sitting on her desk. She rebelled by hanging hundreds of tampons dyed red from every surface in our dorm room. I discovered this while giving my mom her first tour of the place. FML

#269325
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55041) - you deserved it (4997)

On 03/11/2009 at 9:38am - misc - by powsser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called a potential employer. I left a message asking him to return my call. When he did, my drunk friend answered my phone with "I make a sexy-time with my mother in-law." I called him back twice immediately to explain. No answer. That was my last hope for a decent job. FML

#226601
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43884) - you deserved it (7967)

On 03/06/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by sasd32 (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML

#211586
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80763) - you deserved it (4815)

On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)

Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML

#179475
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49962) - you deserved it (8831)

On 03/02/2009 at 12:52am - kids - by alejita (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting this one year old. She just learned how to say yes so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said "yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty... she looked at me and said "NO." FML

#171559
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60366) - you deserved it (13173)

On 03/01/2009 at 3:29pm - kids - by hi (woman) - United States (New York)



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