Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jdkfgkjdfb

Search for a member

jdkfgkjdfb

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 27222
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

jdkfgkjdfb's page activity

Visits<b>naturallyfuck</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 1:27am<b>obnum</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:21pm<b>conman1198</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:39pm<b>cartoonboy</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:23am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:41pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/08/2009 at 11:17pm<b>ihateharrypotter</b> - the 08/23/2009 at 1:12am<b>GtaTomV</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 12:30pm<b>mrfitzpatrick</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 11:02pm<b>mari0958</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 4:09pm<b>kindmoby</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 4:26am<b>epic_name</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 3:33am<b>BUTitsBROKEN</b> - the 06/25/2009 at 9:13pm<b>blue16</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 10:24am<b>pyromaniac239</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 11:57am<b>donnieandalicia</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 5:20pm<b>jmud</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 9:04pm<b>miltonbradley</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 11:39pm

jdkfgkjdfb's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jdkfgkjdfb's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

#3816010
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43783) - you deserved it (8977)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by joe1234 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML

#3505255
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41512) - you deserved it (21859)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by shit... (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I finished the run for a play in which I played a gay man. Now that all the performances are over, I have kissed a man more times in my life than I have kissed a woman. I'm straight. FML

#2963863
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48968) - you deserved it (9394)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:06am - love - by yashmoshin1 (man) - United States

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (140448) - you deserved it (10025)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119895) - you deserved it (74072)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, was teacher appreciation day at my school. They played a slideshow of all the teachers. The students cheered wildly for every teacher. When my picture came up, nobody clapped. The whole room was quiet. FML

#2693631
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54976) - you deserved it (24752)

On 06/07/2009 at 3:21pm - kids - by Ignatius (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84240) - you deserved it (223858)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22987) - you deserved it (75860)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, at Jiffy Lube a woman and her 4 year-old son were waiting at the checkout counter. As I walk by them, her son mistakes me for his father and holds my hand. The woman immediately grabs her son's wrist, looks at me, and says "Sicko." FML

#2341897
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53395) - you deserved it (2559)

On 05/27/2009 at 2:37pm - misc - by thebigpeezy - United States

Today, I was at a mall. A woman stopped by me, said slowly and loudly, in Spanish "baño?" Knowing a bit of Spanish, I nodded and pointed the restrooms out for her. She then mutters about "dang Mexicans and their inability to speak English". I'm not even Latina. I'm Irish-American. FML

#2308873
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64303) - you deserved it (3751)

On 05/26/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by Anon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

#2282414
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19709) - you deserved it (40596)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by wordmalfunction (man) - United Kingdom (London)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: