Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jazzybaby05

Search for a member

jazzybaby05

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 989
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jazzybaby05 :

jazzybaby05's page activity

Visits<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 7:24pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 12:19pm<b>super3286</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 1:48am<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 10:10pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 8:32pm<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 10:06am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 7:17am<b>Trollx</b> - the 06/10/2013 at 1:36am<b>olpally</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 11:05pm<b>jackson38</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 12:44pm<b>KaiCer0</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 2:32pm<b>mn_shr</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 7:43am<b>SmokeyPlague</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 8:32am<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 11:38pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 4:58pm<b>fmlBC</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 9:25pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 11:52am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 12:25am

jazzybaby05's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of jazzybaby05's badges

jazzybaby05's favorite FMLs

Today, I toured an art museum. Our tour guide had an obvious lisp, so I tried my best not to laugh. When she asked me a question about a sculpture, I accidentally responded "Yeth ma'am". She ended the tour right there. FML

#14910524
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7772) - you deserved it (60536)

On 02/09/2011 at 3:56pm - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally got a reply to the letter to a celebrity that I had to write for my English class. It was a restraining order. FML

#14908129
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29731) - you deserved it (6995)

On 02/09/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by PrestonW -

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

#14742735
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31404) - you deserved it (3048)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by bittenbyadonkey (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my maths teacher was giving my whole class a lecture on 'if you don't pay attention at school, you will fail.' She then pointed out out a man working on the roof and said: 'if you don't listen, you will end up like that guy.' That was my dad. FML

#14596121
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (2855)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by paperbox (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML

#14493785
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25176) - you deserved it (2947)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

#14199411
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14339) - you deserved it (26975)

On 12/14/2010 at 4:26am - health - by shit (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got my science test back. I thought I did a horrible job on it, but only three were circled. I was happy but doubtful that I did so well, so I asked my teacher just to make sure. He said it was faster to circle the correct answers. FML

#13835168
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10688) - you deserved it (24988)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:33am - misc - by lovemyteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the waterpark and my kids were fighting so I grounded them both. We concluded the day by boogey boarding on a mechanical wave. There was so much water I didn't realize my boobs had completely fallen out of my bikini. As revenge, my kids didn't tell me. FML

#13823164
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22915) - you deserved it (18343)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:29am - misc - by sandyseashells10 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML

#13005012
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28957) - you deserved it (3162)

On 09/11/2010 at 2:59pm - misc - by wantontsu -

Today, I was missing $20 from my wallet, so I decided to ask my sister if she had taken it. Her response? "That reminds me, I need to borrow another 50." She has a job. That was my Christmas money. FML

#8297602
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22756) - you deserved it (2303)

On 02/15/2010 at 12:02pm - money - by Ambar - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a piece of rice in my belly button. I can't remember the last time I ate or handled rice. FML

#7450166
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7341) - you deserved it (31875)

On 01/20/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by kerry (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by writing "we're through fat slob" on my forehead whilst I was asleep in permanent marker. FML

#7341507
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33595) - you deserved it (4473)

On 01/14/2010 at 5:35pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was at the beach with my friend for vacation. We were playing Marco Polo in the ocean and I was Marco. I thought I heard my friend, so I lunged forward and grabbed her. Too bad it wasn't my friend, it was an old guy in a pink speedo, and I grabbed his butt. FML

#6618449
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22638) - you deserved it (8345)

On 12/05/2009 at 4:04pm - misc - by yoyo22 - United States

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41481) - you deserved it (4526)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while I was in confession, I was saying my sins and the priest called me a "pain in the ass." FML

#6508177
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34736) - you deserved it (9040)

On 11/29/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by ? - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: