About jazziness : I like Bruno Mars uhmmm I played lacrosse, sorta. I love FML and been here a while but I don't usually comment because everyone excepts some stupid witty response. kk bye...
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8308) - you deserved it (42528)
On 02/13/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by SpLo0gIeR - United States
Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24587) - you deserved it (4394)
Today, I received a parking fine for $147. My car isn't even worth that much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16648) - you deserved it (5046)
Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18899) - you deserved it (1806)
On 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm - misc - by rapper in training (man) - United States
Today, my husband started a food fight. During our wedding reception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22846) - you deserved it (4188)
On 02/09/2012 at 10:17am - love - by Zoey (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my fiancé has decided to become my cat's personal trainer. This includes talking to the cat, attempting to motivate him to run up and down the stairs and telling the cat to call him "Coach Daddy". I now have a crazy fiancé and a very angry cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17326) - you deserved it (3875)
On 02/05/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by oh.geez (woman) - United States
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11688) - you deserved it (14939)
On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I took off my sweatshirt in the middle of class. The tanktop I was wearing underneath went with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23621) - you deserved it (5429)
On 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23219) - you deserved it (4293)
On 02/02/2012 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12735) - you deserved it (3134)
Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28522) - you deserved it (2418)
On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland
Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14749) - you deserved it (6362)
On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)
Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16394) - you deserved it (2486)
On 01/30/2012 at 4:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16394) - you deserved it (2486)
On 01/30/2012 at 4:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15192) - you deserved it (3073)
On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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