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jazziness

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jazziness
  • Town/Country : Ohio, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3951
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jazziness : Gym, Tan, Lax
Minus the gym part haha

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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jazziness's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

#19406343
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7201) - you deserved it (34321)

On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

#19401228
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (3880)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was so excited to hear my phone get a message that I jumped out of my seat. It was the TV, advertising texting plans. FML

#19374122
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16694) - you deserved it (4315)

On 03/30/2012 at 1:10am - misc - by Anon (woman) - New Zealand

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to read my dog's mind. FML

#19361987
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4636) - you deserved it (24091)

On 03/28/2012 at 2:57am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML

#19352166
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18705) - you deserved it (4834)

On 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm - intimacy - by JC (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

#19347272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24353) - you deserved it (1925)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36631) - you deserved it (11379)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have been left home alone, the electricity has cut out, and I am petrified of the dark. I am stuck downstairs making karate noises every few minutes to scare off creepers. FML

#19292918
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19286) - you deserved it (11100)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:45am - misc - by belieber101 - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

#19291584
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33576) - you deserved it (2536)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:53am - misc - by Taylor Easley - United States (California)

Today, I got threatened with a gun through the drive thru speaker because I didn't offer some guy any pies to go with his meal. FML

#19291503
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20564) - you deserved it (2523)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:37am - work - by CDeVeney92 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23295) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23295) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

#19281871
92 comments

Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML

#19281634
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5357) - you deserved it (40275)

On 03/15/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by muzikmaler91 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23869) - you deserved it (2905)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States



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