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jazziness

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jazziness

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6683
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jazziness : Gym, Tan, Lax
Minus the gym part haha

jazziness's page activity

Visits<b>Wondermage</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:56pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 9:25pm<b>TheTrainKid</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 12:05pm<b>Amiiii</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:47pm<b>legodude28</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:13pm<b>KhazKhazz</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 3:25pm<b>bananassin</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 2:32pm<b>NoNamedBrilliant</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 4:54am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 4:58pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:35pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:30pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:10pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 2:17am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 8:34pm<b>infected150</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 10:19am<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:29pm<b>SpanishDude42</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 8:59am<b>mydumblifesucks</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:07pm

Fucked!<b>SpanishDude42</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 2:59pm

jazziness's FML badges

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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jazziness's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was sick so I took her 5 year old daughter out to eat. Half-way through our "date" she asks me loudly "Can we go back to the car now and take our clothes off?" Apparently she meant her toy dog's clothes. Face burning, we left a half laughing/half glaring crowd behind. FML

#1962553
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44159) - you deserved it (2864)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by BigBadTron (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my husband and I got back from our honeymoon and we saw his mom's car in front of our house. When we walked in she asked us so many questions about our trip. The first question she asked my husband was, "Were you satisfied with her in bed?" FML

#1625692
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60841) - you deserved it (3168)

On 05/04/2009 at 1:17pm - misc - by Jess (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my alarm went off at 6.30. I woke up disorientated, as usual. I looked up and saw a dark, mysterious figure entering my room. Still half asleep, I screamed and dived under my covers. The dark, mysterious figure was my mom. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML

#1564480
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19508) - you deserved it (43164)

On 05/02/2009 at 4:44pm - misc - by screamo (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML

#1547759
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68517) - you deserved it (9189)

On 05/02/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by systeminitiated (man) - Canada

Today, my family and I went to a beach where you could swim with dolphins. I was a little scared to swim with them so the trainers had a 5 minute chat to me about how they were harmless creatures. Once I got in, the dolphin attacked me and bit me. FML

#1050396
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62908) - you deserved it (6920)

On 04/17/2009 at 7:49am - misc - by Anonymous - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I was walking into class when the guy i like walked in and said "Gross it smells like grandma in here. What, did someone bathe in their perfume today?" I was the only girl in the room and I just bought new perfume. I thought I smelled good, apparently I didn't. FML

#961162
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40858) - you deserved it (12713)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:50pm - misc - by eMmA01 (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When i came back my car was blocked by a parade of people. I turned to a shop worker smoking a cigarette and said "Jesus! What the hell is going on?" I got many strange looks. It was a Good Friday parade lead by a local church. FML

#920023
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15343) - you deserved it (44119)

On 04/11/2009 at 10:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to give a speech on abstinence to a bunch of teenage boys, and surprisingly they were paying attention. After they left, I went to the bathroom and saw I had missed a few buttons on my blouse. The boys had a close up view of my cleavage for 3 hours. FML

#831890
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21155) - you deserved it (59193)

On 04/06/2009 at 6:41am - misc - by Anna (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was babysitting for a new family. While the father was telling me about bed times and how to reach him, their dog started humping my leg. As I tried to discreetly push the dog away, his paw got caught in the pocket of my huge sweatpants, pulling them down. I was wearing a thong. FML

#771625
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65116) - you deserved it (11075)

On 04/02/2009 at 7:05pm - animals - by darlingditz (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, for april fools day, my entire class decided to prank our religion teacher. During our daily meditation time, while his eyes were closed, we slowly got out of our seats and left the classroom. Two minutes later he opened his eyes, locked us out, and called the dean to give us all detention. FML

#760336
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19698) - you deserved it (72725)

On 04/02/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by aprilfooled (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

#516952
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53392) - you deserved it (12018)

On 03/21/2009 at 8:06pm - misc - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the phone kept ringing but there was only silence on the other line. The third time I yelled, "What the fuck is your F*ing problem asshole!? Get a life shithead!" and hung up. Then the pastor's wife called and explained that she mistakingly set her phone on mute. FML

#430302
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18706) - you deserved it (61137)

On 03/17/2009 at 11:48pm - misc - by jina (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML

#339773
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119132) - you deserved it (8248)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by Alexa23 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was woken up by the sound of power tools at 6:30am. I stuck my head out my window and yelled at them to shut up. They didn't stop. I walked out the front door to find the bastard. It was firemen. They were sawing down the door of my neighbour's burning house. FML



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