jazziness

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jazziness

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8611
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jazziness : Gym, Tan, Lax
Minus the gym part haha

jazziness's page activity

Visits<b>krazy789</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 8:23pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 10:46pm<b>The12thPaladin</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 10:58am<b>jcrum33</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:46pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:01am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 4:45pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:55am<b>Skycop_S</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 11:51pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 9:45pm<b>Roozb</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 9:37am<b>paravoz</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 2:18am<b>Ugo318</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 6:29pm<b>COURT_KING</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 12:21pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 6:37pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 4:41pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:14am<b>acp2002</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 11:37pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 11:40am

Fucked!<b>tiger820</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 7:32pm<b>patts_</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 9:22pm<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 5:52pm<b>SpanishDude42</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 2:59pm

jazziness's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of jazziness's badges

jazziness's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

by DwarfFrog / 06/18/2012 at 7:38am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

by rachiej8 / 06/10/2012 at 12:13am / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML

by sh3n-D / 06/07/2012 at 5:26pm / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Health

Today, in a drunken state, I decided that it would be a good idea to shave with a pizza cutter. FML

by Darwin_Award_Winner / 06/07/2012 at 8:10am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I found out I have an incredible fear of butterflies. I discovered this after my mother took me to a butterfly sanctuary for some "mother-daughter bonding time." FML

by anonymous / 06/07/2012 at 7:00am / United States / Animals

Today, I moved into a new house. The landlord insists it's OK for her to come up whenever she wants because she owns the house. We aren't allowed to lock the doors and she has two 8-year-olds. They come into the bathroom every time they hear the shower running. We have a clear shower curtain. FML

by HELP / 06/06/2012 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

by BrianTheLion89 / 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML

by Damn / 06/05/2012 at 3:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

by why... / 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

by BooBabe / 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2012 at 1:50am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

by ironyisabitch / 06/02/2012 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm / Greece (Attiki) / Intimacy

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love