About jazziness : I like Bruno Mars uhmmm I played lacrosse, sorta. I love FML and been here a while but I don't usually comment because everyone excepts some stupid witty response. kk bye...
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27023) - you deserved it (2017)
On 12/06/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by Rash (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10940) - you deserved it (27567)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20159) - you deserved it (4440)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36942) - you deserved it (2822)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, I discovered that you should always unplug the electric mixer before licking the beaters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (52510)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by seanjohn268 (man) - Canada
Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (2260)
On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56578) - you deserved it (2319)
On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)
Today, I re-broke my leg. The same way I broke it the first time, playing frisbee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15181) - you deserved it (8809)
On 11/25/2011 at 3:44am - health - by Sammy - United States (Georgia)
Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23176) - you deserved it (2031)
On 11/24/2011 at 10:12pm - misc - by hannahlorraine - United States
Today, my entire family came over for thanksgiving. It went pretty well, only four family members got in a fist fight and only one cop car was called. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19897) - you deserved it (1580)
On 11/24/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by guy - United States
Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25564) - you deserved it (2390)
On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, while working at my local supermarket, a customer threw a turkey at me because we "should have bigger ones." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22141) - you deserved it (1811)
On 11/24/2011 at 11:46am - work - by Justforlolz - United States (New York)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29385) - you deserved it (5243)
On 11/16/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by halloweed (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I sent the texts "I love and miss you babe;)." and "Shit wrong person." to my ex just so he would think I have a life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14224) - you deserved it (41684)
On 11/13/2011 at 1:16am - love - by random person - United States (Ohio)
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me. His response? "It's not like I liked it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29761) - you deserved it (2494)
On 11/06/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by Cat - United States (Arkansas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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