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jaylaufers

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jaylaufers
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  • Number of visits : 907
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

#16977432
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27348) - you deserved it (5562)

On 07/04/2011 at 8:25pm - misc - by brittbrat4 - United States

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

#16918734
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46381) - you deserved it (4382)

On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

#16416725
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46147) - you deserved it (4201)

On 05/30/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by Jess - United States

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

#16301651
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47517) - you deserved it (3673)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup. A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said, "Are you crying because you're ugly?" FML

#16116610
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40918) - you deserved it (5218) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France

Today, my friend told me that her favourite aunt died last night of a heart attack. The first thing I could think of to say was, "Oh no, is she okay?" FML

#15935216
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13940) - you deserved it (33755)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:11pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I lied to my diary about my weight. FML

#15932623
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18849) - you deserved it (43294)

On 04/26/2011 at 9:56am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend finally found a roommate after hopelessly looking for months. I was really anxious to meet the guy because I would most likely be spending a good amount of time with him. Who did my boyfriend end up picking as his new roommate? My ex-boyfriend. FML

#15884642
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37744) - you deserved it (3912)

On 04/22/2011 at 10:40am - misc - by doubletrouble (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18258) - you deserved it (28317)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

#15843459
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35366) - you deserved it (14967)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

#15078337
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39109) - you deserved it (8274)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents, not trusting me and my boyfriend, told us to call them in the middle of our movie so they could hear it, and prove we weren't up to no good. Well, I called. Just as a raging sex scene started. FML

#14709189
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30254) - you deserved it (10638)

On 01/25/2011 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by totallyscrewedomg - United States (Texas)

Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML

#14647834
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8890) - you deserved it (30530)

On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was chosen by my coworkers to explain to my elderly boss that ''tossing the salad'' isn't another expression for saying ''brainstorming''. She didn't believe me. Guess we will all keep ''tossing the salad'' for new ideas each afternoon. FML

#14646268
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17287) - you deserved it (2163)

On 01/20/2011 at 1:01am - intimacy - by welly223 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

#14644616
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28201) - you deserved it (6217)

On 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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