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jaylaufers

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jaylaufers

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 2548
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jaylaufers's page activity

Visits<b>GiantEyedSuirrel</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 6:39am<b>screamtobeheard</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 4:59pm<b>gamersonly1234</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 12:06am<b>pinkster2014</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 11:44pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 9:03pm

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jaylaufers's favorite FMLs

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32889) - you deserved it (6575)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

#21364983
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34366) - you deserved it (4979)

On 02/28/2015 at 12:03am - intimacy - by FreshDonuts (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15237) - you deserved it (25619)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends and I were talking about our celebrity lookalikes. We decided that my friends all had attractive celebrity lookalikes, including Scarlett Johansson and Hayden Panettiere. When it was my turn, they decided that my "celebrity" lookalike is the Pillsbury Doughboy. FML

#21330766
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26064) - you deserved it (3282)

On 01/04/2015 at 4:53pm - misc - by KD (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

#21323815
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29717) - you deserved it (2464)

On 12/25/2014 at 6:47am - misc - by dunn76 - United States

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35200) - you deserved it (6746)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

#21303227
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31559) - you deserved it (3537)

On 11/21/2014 at 8:51am - misc - by UTRejected (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got sick at school. When someone called my mom for permission for me to leave, she told them she doesn't have a daughter and to never call that number again. FML

Today, marks yet again another day that I've been asked if I'm autistic. No, that's just my Korean accent. Apparently I look "too white" to have one. FML

#21265402
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31995) - you deserved it (2451)

On 09/25/2014 at 9:15pm - misc - by notautistic - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55376) - you deserved it (5638)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50108) - you deserved it (4314)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

#21218609
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42274) - you deserved it (5022)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35306) - you deserved it (11549)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48928) - you deserved it (6982)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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