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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47809) - you deserved it (3365)
On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I smoked weed with friends. Stoned, I put on my sister's high heels instead of my Vans and I walked to 7-11. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16575) - you deserved it (65439)
On 04/27/2013 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML
I agree, your life sucks (47695) - you deserved it (3255)
On 04/21/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by gamerguru13 - United States (New York)
Today, I went on my first date. Everything went great until I went to brush my date's hair over her ear like they do in the movies. I poked her dead in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38784) - you deserved it (12888)
On 04/19/2013 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I tried to explain to my history teacher why Woodrow Wilson would not have called the Great War "World War 1" as she constantly claims. I was sent to the office for my insubordination. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32408) - you deserved it (3528)
On 04/18/2013 at 3:54am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got ancestry DNA tests for my parents and myself. The DNA testing company informed me that I'm a 50% match for my mother but I share no DNA with my father. Apparently, both my parents forgot that they used a sperm donor. This insignificant detail has slipped their minds for 35 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40478) - you deserved it (2320)
On 04/17/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Flora (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (53098) - you deserved it (9759)
On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57786) - you deserved it (3130)
On 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm - love - by lonely (woman) - United States
Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34993) - you deserved it (4506)
On 04/08/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by badparent (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was on a scavenger hunt. One of the things on the list was to ask a stranger to marry them. I saw an old lady in a wheel chair; I tried to make her day by asking her to marry me. She declined and attempted to run me over with her wheel chair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18157) - you deserved it (22292)
On 04/03/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by nickcedola40 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boss fired me from my job at a local family-owned business. Thanks, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29774) - you deserved it (7747)
On 04/02/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37754) - you deserved it (2654)
On 04/02/2013 at 12:11am - work - by QuinnyZebrass (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (4378)
On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML
I agree, your life sucks (60670) - you deserved it (5773)
On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33344) - you deserved it (4024)
On 03/15/2013 at 1:44am - misc - by fmlman - United States (Wyoming)
Friday 24 May 2013
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