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jay_south

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jay_south

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 869
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jay_south : So when I'm bored in class, I take out my phone and read this site.
When you're bored, apparently you read my profile page. Not sure if I'm flattered or creeped out...

jay_south's page activity

Visits<b>theswanlake</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:59am<b>Weemo04</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:54pm<b>funsizedliz</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:52pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:31pm<b>melons</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 4:13am<b>dotalover</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 8:10pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 11:02am<b>aliyourpally</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 3:47pm<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 4:33pm<b>Stylux</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 4:43am

jay_south's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of jay_south's badges

jay_south's favorite FMLs

Today, in a crowded doctor's waiting room, my two-year-old daughter let a loud fart rip. I asked her, "What do we say?" She replied, "IT'S ME!" FML

#21398419
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28275) - you deserved it (4013) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/23/2015 at 8:27am - kids - by bleue - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (156) - you deserved it (35)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29927) - you deserved it (7911)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45505) - you deserved it (5931)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

#21243040
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40320) - you deserved it (2746)

On 08/22/2014 at 9:14am - work - by Beeky (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my cat tried to jump up to the window, and missed. This would have been hilarious if I had not been sleeping under that same window, and then caught him with my face. FML

#21225823
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36728) - you deserved it (4083)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43202) - you deserved it (6150)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML

#21188726
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47902) - you deserved it (5386)

On 06/26/2014 at 12:57am - animals - by Pisser (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42953) - you deserved it (6239)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54791) - you deserved it (19857)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

#21130223
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47718) - you deserved it (4975)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42380) - you deserved it (8300)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49351) - you deserved it (12630)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41204) - you deserved it (8383) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)



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