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jawa897

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jawa897

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  • Number of visits : 6236
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jawa897's page activity

Visits<b>candymonster191</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 1:42pm<b>GuessWut</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:25am<b>Keattles</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 9:54am

jawa897's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of jawa897's badges

jawa897's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25515) - you deserved it (3093)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while working at McDonald's, a guy asked me to deep fry his salad. FML

#21376328
104 comments

Today, my girlfriend confessed to cheating on me. Unfortunately, she's a pathological liar and I can't be sure if it's really true, along with half the stuff she tells me on a daily basis. Love is hard. FML

#21356609
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29586) - you deserved it (9887)

On 02/15/2015 at 11:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

#21356191
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36188) - you deserved it (3456)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband fell asleep while cuddling. I didn't want to wake him, so I lay there for ages, trying to fall asleep. Just as I finally dozed off, my leg uncontrollably jerked and hit him in the nuts. He's convinced I did it deliberately as revenge for an argument we had 5 days ago. FML

#21355326
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27382) - you deserved it (2942)

On 02/13/2015 at 12:33pm - misc - by Innocence (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in the middle of my haircut, the hairdresser went into labor. They never finished cutting it. FML

#21347835
76 comments

Today, I got back from a two-day trip for which I'd left my husband and kids at home. There's fresh vomit inside of my oven, and my 4 year old son has a mullet. FML

#21347579
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32133) - you deserved it (3685)

On 02/01/2015 at 12:50am - misc - by neverleavingagain (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I shaved my beard in preparation for an important work conference. Now my dog won't stop growling and barking at me. FML

#21345020
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25207) - you deserved it (2886)

On 01/27/2015 at 10:09am - animals - by dogproblems (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

#21290572
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (3901)

On 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was singing in my dorm. When I left a little later, a cute guy came up to me and asked if I was the girl who'd been singing. I proudly said yes. He replied, "Good thing you finally shut the fuck up!" and walked away. FML

#21290447
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30926) - you deserved it (9259)

On 11/02/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38534) - you deserved it (10846)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

#21289931
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33890) - you deserved it (2822)

On 11/01/2014 at 6:22pm - kids - by ThaBoss12 - United States (California)

Today, my brother and I were talking about Ebola, when he says he would love to have the disease because of how famous it would make him. Plus, his college essays about him "fighting through the disease" would be "phenomenal". FML

#21278125
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34539) - you deserved it (3053)

On 10/15/2014 at 12:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

#21274726
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33871) - you deserved it (5126)

On 10/10/2014 at 1:52am - love - by Jasmine (woman) - United States (California)



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