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jasonmar

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jasonmar

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 652
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jasonmar : Hi my names jason. I'm from Salt Lake City, Utah but am currently living in Shanghai, China. FML keeps me sane on those rough China days!

jasonmar's page activity

Visits<b>taylor21398</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 10:17pm<b>Wonder_Woman257</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 11:00pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 11:23am<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 4:38pm<b>thisawkwardchick</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 7:07pm<b>KRAZYKILLAKLOWN</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 7:00am<b>Bubule</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 11:56am<b>RockNRollAndrew</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:20pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 3:44pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:33pm<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 9:31pm<b>13taylorswift</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 8:18pm<b>windell</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 1:50am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 3:14pm<b>Jeeper4Life</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 11:11am<b>REALAfroninga</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 8:56am<b>macorncob</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 9:04am<b>inteli3</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 12:41am

jasonmar's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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jasonmar's favorite FMLs

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

#17981728
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32114) - you deserved it (2063)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

#17880531
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31602) - you deserved it (4170)

On 10/01/2011 at 6:45pm - misc - by FirstStringQB - United States (California)

Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML

#17711935
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26931) - you deserved it (2647)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
673 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30084) - you deserved it (49098)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33195) - you deserved it (4467)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52335) - you deserved it (3497)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML

#17365411
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13819) - you deserved it (56693)

On 08/04/2011 at 9:41am - kids - by makeitstop (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, our power went out due to some severe storms. My daughter, who is 18, asked me why the lights on the car still worked. FML

#17333376
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35412) - you deserved it (8988)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by OhDeary (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my daughter asked why there was an X marked on a telephone pole. I told her they were going to remove it. She started crying and saying, "They can't kill the tree!" She is 16. FML

#17036042
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29684) - you deserved it (6801)

On 07/09/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by anon - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

#16998038
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52398) - you deserved it (16497)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:26am - intimacy - by devilboy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (37903)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

#16286045
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8681) - you deserved it (58010)

On 05/21/2011 at 7:33pm - misc - by aridaley - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML

#16271317
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33463) - you deserved it (4590)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm - misc - by SophieGray - United States (New York)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35791) - you deserved it (4763)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML

#14647834
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9633) - you deserved it (32416)

On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)



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