jasminejzhu

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jasminejzhu

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1329
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 24 posted

About jasminejzhu : I can't guarantee that my FMLs and their subsequent follow-up messages are completely accurate as they may or may not have identifying details altered to maintain the privacy of others. However, if I express empathy towards another FML, I can guarantee that it comes from the bottom of my heart.

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jasminejzhu's page activity

Visits<b>conman317</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 11:14am<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 2:08pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 3:59pm<b>agustibaarn</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 4:38pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:41pm<b>crystal_cbr</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 2:46am<b>glubbwubb</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:42pm<b>hellspawnjuggalo</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 7:26am<b>DanielBenyamin</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 3:46pm<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 8:46pm<b>wardie</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 1:05pm

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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jasminejzhu's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2013 at 5:24am / Australia / Love

Today, my Romeo and Juliet style relationship hit an all time low when my boyfriend's parents filed a lawsuit against my parents. FML

by Juliet / 04/11/2013 at 8:40pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

by fatmom / 04/10/2013 at 9:26am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Kids

Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 4:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health

Today, my doctor asked me how often I drink, and I responded, "Socially." My three-year-old piped up, "No Mom, you drink all the time." My doctor now thinks I'm a raging alcoholic. My kid has never seen me drink. FML

by AAMBC4 / 04/09/2013 at 6:30am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while at a hospital, a prayer group circled me and started praying that God and the good doctors and nurses would heal me from the disease that disfigured my face. I was there to visit my sick grandmother. FML

by chinatownhobo / 04/08/2013 at 2:12am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Health

Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML

by badparent / 04/08/2013 at 12:26am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I was playing Draw Something with my girlfriend, when I decided to start a game with some other people. She immediately accused me of "cheating" on her, and still refuses to talk to me. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 2:14pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Love

Today, a guy left flowers on my doorstep. I got home to find my dad claiming he bought them for my mum. I told my parents they were mine, they laughed in my face. FML

by lp525252 / 03/20/2013 at 6:59am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I had a job interview. I didn't have any clothes suitable for the interview, so I went to the store early and bought some there. After the interview, I went to return the clothes, because they were so expensive. The hiring manager saw me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2013 at 12:14pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I sent a dozen roses and a hand-written, heart-felt note to my ex-girlfriend to show her that I'm still madly in love with her. When I asked if she got the flowers I sent, she replied, "Yeah but you got the wrong color. You should've gotten yellow, that stands for friendship." FML

by Roses are Red / 03/07/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, due to plumbing issues, I had to choose between a goosebump-inducing cold or skin-blistering hot shower. This is the 7th day in a row. My husband says it shouldn't be more than another week before he "gets it figured out". FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous