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jardinteylor

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jardinteylor

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4437
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jardinteylor's page activity

Visits<b>QD</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:16am<b>agustibaarn</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 5:48pm<b>1nfinitee</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:02am<b>garage</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 3:32pm<b>XxNekoLovexX</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 3:21pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 10:39pm<b>adragonhunter</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 7:11pm<b>blcusername</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 10:44pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 7:56am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:30am<b>A7X_all_the_way</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 10:17pm<b>poor_gurll1198</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 5:03am<b>XxduckiexX</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:21am<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 3:54pm<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:27am<b>PageantGirlXOXO</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 3:36am<b>xfoxen</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 1:24pm<b>laney_bug_</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 10:58pm

jardinteylor's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jardinteylor's favorite FMLs

Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

#2158640
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58037) - you deserved it (3657)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, we went out to dinner to a family restaurant, and I was wearing a skirt since it's so warm out. My 4 year old scooted under the table to sit next to his brother. When he popped up on the other side, he exclaimed, "Mommy! You forgot to put on your underwears!" People were staring. FML

#2140359
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16606) - you deserved it (58567)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:45am - kids - by whoopsiedoodle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was hanging out with a few of my friends, including an old ex-girlfriend and her current boyfriend of 5 years. When my ex, whose virginity I had taken years earlier, mentioned, "I had the iPhone first," without thinking, I immediately responded, "Well, I had YOU first." FML

#2103981
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18688) - you deserved it (88163)

On 05/20/2009 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Takuma (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

#2076493
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59853) - you deserved it (8460)

On 05/19/2009 at 10:04am - kids - by nana (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML

#1866535
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75029) - you deserved it (10820)

On 05/12/2009 at 3:19am - health - by bathroomseww (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML

#1845707
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54430) - you deserved it (27621)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Wormy - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got to sleep in late for the first time in 3 years, as wife took our two young daughters out of town to visit with her parents. I told my mother that I was really looking forward to being able to sleep in this morning. The phone rang at 7:30. It was my mother asking me how I slept. FML

#1746299
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52387) - you deserved it (5200)

On 05/08/2009 at 11:20am - misc - by Wally (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML

#1713391
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54492) - you deserved it (5364)

On 05/07/2009 at 8:39am - love - by TrulyYours (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

#1690188
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99012) - you deserved it (22732)

On 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Familyskank (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I pissed my younger brother off. Seemingly unrelated to this was the fact that I left my laptop on in my room along with MSN signed into my email adress. Now, all my contacts know that I apparently "just love the warm feeling of semen sliding down my throat". FML

#1667670
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44199) - you deserved it (30882)

On 05/05/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

#1250407
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52934) - you deserved it (10069)

On 04/23/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
927 comments

I agree, your life sucks (353668) - you deserved it (38794)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned I wanted to stay at school over the summer and work. He asked if it would be lonely with the campus empty, when I replied that my friends would be working here too. He asked: "What, all two of them?" FML

#829744
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49997) - you deserved it (4611)

On 04/06/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by halebop (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML



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