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50 favourites
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Mobility
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Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16415) - you deserved it (1276)
On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)
Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21964) - you deserved it (2867)
On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, the couch I bought a week ago was delivered. I don't know which is worse: my son being the one to point out it's been "used", or that he used a black light to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28381) - you deserved it (2417)
On 05/19/2013 at 3:35am - kids - by disappointed dad - United States
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32306) - you deserved it (2640)
On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51521) - you deserved it (3215)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36962) - you deserved it (4767) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/15/2013 at 2:58am - misc - by grossesfesses (woman) - France (Picardie)
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75622) - you deserved it (4342)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41191) - you deserved it (3241)
On 05/12/2013 at 1:20am - health - by those_allergies - United States (Oregon)
Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44667) - you deserved it (15645)
On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico
Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49858) - you deserved it (6069)
On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41649) - you deserved it (4707)
On 05/11/2013 at 5:19pm - kids - by failure as a parent (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35045) - you deserved it (6006)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I found out I have something in common with three other girls. We all have the same boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48422) - you deserved it (4225)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:01am - love - by Bridget - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thanked him anyway and encouraged him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49362) - you deserved it (3801)
On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44930) - you deserved it (3104)
On 05/09/2013 at 3:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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