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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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james_lee_dakota's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/26/2011 at 12:30am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML
by Ima_Moronski / 07/25/2011 at 11:35pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health
by j / 07/25/2011 at 10:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, a drunk crashed a truck into my porch. Shaken up, I was glad to see that so many of my neighbors had gathered around to comfort me. When the dust settled, I noticed my remaining porch furniture was missing. They weren't consoling me, they were casing the place. FML
by ypsitucky / 07/25/2011 at 9:32pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML
by ninja_blasphemer / 07/25/2011 at 3:24pm / Ireland (Wexford) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML
by youjustsuck / 07/25/2011 at 2:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by montextes / 07/25/2011 at 12:12pm / United States (Nevada) / Geek
by Smokey9 / 07/25/2011 at 11:12am / United States (Florida) / Health
by ugly / 07/24/2011 at 10:53pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/24/2011 at 8:21pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 07/24/2011 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML
by Username / 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
by quickfingers100 / 07/22/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, my mother-in-law visited the house while my husband and I were at work. When we returned, we discovered she'd shredded and thrown away all the scribbled on papers sprawled on our messy desks. We're graphics designers. Those were rough sketches for about 14 different clients. FML
by Mirorbo / 06/11/2011 at 2:09am / United States (California) / Work
by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…