james71993

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Offline (the 09/26/2016 at 8:19am)

james71993

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 July 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 641
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About james71993 : Just a soldier looking to lighten up his day

james71993's page activity

Visits<b>Fluffyturtle21</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 12:34am<b>Andrew_Weschke</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:28pm<b>tsviets1993</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 10:29am<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:09pm<b>peachbutt</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 6:17pm<b>itscare1217</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:33pm<b>AvengingAngelx</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:01am<b>maxymum7</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 5:51am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:20am<b>Becca_Bear_98</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:26pm<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:46pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:47pm<b>NicoleErin</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:08pm<b>AvSvart</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:48am<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:42pm<b>8oded8</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:09am<b>LordScooby</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:18pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 3:28am

james71993's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of james71993's badges

james71993's favorite FMLs

Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML

by NoSpirit / 11/01/2012 at 4:20am / Kids

Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML

by hakuna matata / 10/31/2012 at 6:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

by LonelyMe / 10/30/2012 at 9:27am / Love

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

by Andrew / 10/30/2012 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my family and I are sitting in our house while Hurricane Sandy is going on. My grandma is freaking out because she believes it's our recently deceased dog Sandy getting revenge for putting her to sleep and getting a new dog. FML

by With_Love929 / 10/29/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, maintenance came to fix the constantly beeping alarm system near my apartment. They changed it from beeping on-and-off to one never-ending beep, similar to the sound of my sanity flat-lining. FML

by tcm123 / 10/29/2012 at 12:31am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

by Medic / 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

by Monkey / 10/27/2012 at 11:02am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was writing out palm cards and didn't know if I'd spelled a word correctly, so I stared at it for about 10 seconds waiting for spell check to tell me if it was right or not before I realised I was writing on paper. FML

by katier8295 / 10/27/2012 at 8:43am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at work being a waitress, I gave my customer his credit card receipt to sign. Instead of giving him a pen, I pulled a tampon out of my apron pocket and handed it to him. FML

by geena / 10/27/2012 at 2:42am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

by ifeeldirty / 10/27/2011 at 8:22am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids