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jakacki

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jakacki

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 977
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jakacki : My names matt I'm 18 and I'm in the US Army! Im a 31B for all you military personnel :D and I am ARMY STRONG Hooah! I'm currently stationed in Waegwan South Korea.. i love reading FML's they make my day better.. i'm in love with video games and i listen to hardcore and dubstep music..a few of my favorite bands are asking alexandria, we came as romans, falling in reverse, sleeping with sirens, silverstein, chiodos, pierce the veil, abandon all ships, and skrillex.~~if you have any questions or just wanna chat hit me up:) my kik is Jakackimatt~~

jakacki's page activity

Visits<b>KRAZYKILLAKLOWN</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 6:37pm<b>challan</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:26am<b>thischick113</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:50pm<b>Darren22</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:38am<b>filvtumogdcnk</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 4:03am<b>glki</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 5:10pm<b>takenbyarmyboy</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 12:25pm<b>kitkat1255</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 3:19pm<b>happylappy</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 4:29am<b>Ellamare</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 4:46pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 8:06pm<b>gghhffh</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 2:12am<b>SadGirl18</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 10:40pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 9:54pm<b>awkwardsmylife</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:55am<b>EdaPanda</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 3:16am<b>vffjvsegb</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 4:26pm<b>Roskosity</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 12:34am

jakacki's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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jakacki's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

#20467584
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45770) - you deserved it (7257)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:20am - intimacy - by tingles (woman) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42700) - you deserved it (5899)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43728) - you deserved it (9136)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28647) - you deserved it (3143)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

#20438672
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38192) - you deserved it (8950)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46419) - you deserved it (7040) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22549) - you deserved it (44569) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38513) - you deserved it (7951)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28920) - you deserved it (7526)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

#20423262
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26805) - you deserved it (2911)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28316) - you deserved it (7600)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML

#20420364
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32607) - you deserved it (3669)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - love - by un_christmas - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79872) - you deserved it (24530)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48436) - you deserved it (10106)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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