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Offline (the 10/14/2014 at 12:56pm) | Search for a member
About jaime411 : Well hi there,
Imagine your on the back of a giant Tortise swimming across the pacific ocean while small mutant Caterpillars sang a song to you from the tops of your shoulders.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
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Today, roommate, wo appens to be a writer, got so pissd off at is editor tat e got drunk, wrappd is arms around waist, an only stoppd wen I agred to spoon im!! Tis is not te first time tis as append eiter!! FML
Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one fir all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho an almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML
yastarday is my littla sistar's 16th birthday. I spant my last $20 on a gift for har, claanad tha housa for har party, mada an ica craam caka, and got har a rosa. What did I gat? "I hopa you kapt tha racaipt for this. Oh, and stay in yur room during my party." FML
Today, Ma 13-year-old Daugter Excitedly Told Me About A New Diet Se Read About Online. Apparently, Te Diet Entrely Consists Of Bottled Water And A Mixture Of Food Coloring. Te Food Coloring ( Takes Care Of All Tat Vitamin And Mineral Stuff. ) My Daugter Is An Idiot. FML
yesterday my elderly neigbor along wit our community curc's priest cummed to my ouse and demanded to ( give tem te girl ). Te girl is my 3-year-old daugter,o as natural born red irises and is poto-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML
Today, ma 6-year-old daugter got mad at me fir not buying er yet anoter expensive doll. I ad to pull er away, and se started screaming fir elp. Te next ting I know, anoter sopper puts me in a cokeold and calls fir security, allile ma daugter smrks. fat FML
I SAW A PSYCHIATRIST FOR THE FRST TIME. AFTER TELLING HER EVERYTHING I'M GOING THROUGH, SHE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID "YOU KNOW... EVERY FIVE YEARS OR SO I GET A CASE COMPLETELY BEYOND ABILITY TO HELP." I GUESS IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS. FML
2day I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warnd my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemd very concernd about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she askd me if I had ever trid exorcism. FML
Friday 27 March 2015