jaakeeyy1

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Offline (the 07/02/2016 at 6:08am)

jaakeeyy1

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1373
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jaakeeyy1 : I say it like it is.
I love reading all the fml's when i have nothing else better to do at 1am.
Maybe one day one of mine will get published on here, hahah

jaakeeyy1's page activity

Visits<b>Celion91</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:11pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 5:30pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 7:20pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 5:10pm<b>ashmix123</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 3:26pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 6:47am<b>EclipseCandy6</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:22am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 4:20am<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 11:27pm<b>Radieal</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:28pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:11pm<b>Sobe_1900</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 8:15am<b>BigDrewski22</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 1:57pm<b>katebond</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 4:19pm<b>marlie01</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 11:27pm<b>sorryheadphones</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:30pm<b>swaglesshipster</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 7:12pm<b>munchly</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 6:55pm

Fucked!<b>Shelblit69</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 7:32pm<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 4:58am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:47am<b>kylie31</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:39am<b>mmoments</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 6:05am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 9:37pm<b>dancer824</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 2:12am

jaakeeyy1's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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jaakeeyy1's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML

by nowimbroketoo / 07/22/2013 at 1:47pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I heard noises outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML

by wellokaythen / 05/14/2013 at 3:52pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, after coming home from school, I found that two birds have made a nest above the porch light. This wouldn't be a problem if they stopped attacking me every time I get within 5 feet of them. FML

by Locked Out / 05/14/2013 at 3:11pm / United States / Animals

Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Utah) / Transportation

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

by Chichensoup / 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a YouTube video of a guy scratching a knife and a screwdriver on his iPod, and at the end he showed how there were no scratches and the screen was still clean. I took my iPod touch and did the same with a knife. It didn't work. FML

by MgmEboy / 09/19/2009 at 5:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm / United States (Arizona) / Holidays

Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML

by wow / 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

by ouchers / 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML

by Jerrrr / 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2009 at 7:16am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous