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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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izzy_17

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izzy_17
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 283
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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izzy_17's favorite FMLs

Today, as I left class I felt a tug on my rucksack from behind. Thinking it was just someone deliberately dragging me back, I struggled to let myself free and shouted "Let go!". I looked over my shoulder just to find that one the straps was trapped in the doorhandle. Everyone was in hysterics. FML

I agree, your life sucks (6503) - you deserved it (16024)

On 11/19/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by betamaxjim (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML

#6354793 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (29523) - you deserved it (1814)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by Grad2010 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my son told me to grow a pair and ask my girlfriend of a year and a half to marry me. He is 7 years old. FML

#6344201 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (8629) - you deserved it (22936)

On 11/17/2009 at 5:58pm - kids - by unsuspcted (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work, I screamed, used one of my employees as a human shield, dove for cover, and cried. Why? A bat flew into my store. Bats scare me shitless. FML

#6342558 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (16334) - you deserved it (6836)

On 11/17/2009 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (13028) - you deserved it (21607)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I woke up to find that I left my headlights on last night. I found out by the headlights of my car smashed and a post-it note on my windshield saying "you accidentally left your headlights on... I took care of that for you". FML

I agree, your life sucks (20686) - you deserved it (3928)

On 11/14/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by ZINGER (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my son thought he'd take my new car for a drive without permission. He accelerated straight into a tree, reversed into a lamppost and then accelerated again into the neighbours car. FML

#6147430 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (26156) - you deserved it (3076)

On 11/04/2009 at 3:44am - misc - by ishouldhidethekeys (woman) - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML

Today, I went to eat with my girlfriend, her parents and my mother. My mother complained about every aspect of the service. When I told her she needed to assert herself, she took her pocketbook and hit me over the head. The whole restaurant stared at us while she yelled "Is that assertive enough?" FML

I agree, your life sucks (23471) - you deserved it (4327)

On 09/29/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by User06606 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend meeting all of his friends for the first time. My boyfriend went into the kitchen to get me a drink, and after ten minutes I went looking for him. I discovered his friend holding two melons to his chest, mid explanation on how they look exactly like mine. FML

#5368590 (202)

I agree, your life sucks (24924) - you deserved it (4666)

On 09/20/2009 at 8:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I must find a gentle way to tell my 71-year-old mother that she's too old to be wearing shirts that expose her belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks (30146) - you deserved it (1747)

On 09/19/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by elmalo68 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks (24915) - you deserved it (6884)

On 09/19/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by GodDaughter (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my dad to pick me up from school, he said he couldn't. Why? he was busy playing world of warcraft for the night. I got to walk the 3 hours home while my 49 year old dad played computer games. FML

#5263427 (206)

I agree, your life sucks (35617) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/14/2009 at 10:56pm - misc - by stupid (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML

#5224172 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (50609) - you deserved it (2538)

On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was eating M&Ms on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (46171) - you deserved it (10443)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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