itsjuststephenie

Search for a member

Offline (the 03/19/2015 at 5:31pm)

itsjuststephenie

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 March 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 683
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About itsjuststephenie : i'm named after a man. 😳

itsjuststephenie's page activity

Visits<b>Edwin_K</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 10:24am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 9:59pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:25pm<b>mischiefkel</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 3:06pm<b>jezzilla</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:06pm<b>agustibaarn</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:05am<b>davered89</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 4:34pm<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 9:54pm<b>Llamassss</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:02am<b>laylamarianna</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:58am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 10:24pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 5:45am<b>DomiLove</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:18pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:22pm<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 9:49pm<b>TallyFtw69</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 8:37pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 10:11pm<b>Tsunami87</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 1:09pm

Fucked!<b>davered89</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 3:11am

itsjuststephenie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of itsjuststephenie's badges

itsjuststephenie's favorite FMLs

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

by unashamed / 06/05/2014 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

by wtfjusthappened / 01/31/2014 at 10:29am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

by polluxdc / 01/10/2014 at 3:20am / United States (Oregon) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

by clodius / 11/20/2013 at 1:25pm / United Kingdom (North Lanarkshire) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

by mummer11 / 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

by StrandedWhale / 11/03/2013 at 2:21am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my husband and I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing the matter again. Later on, he made us lasagna. The moment I swallowed the first mouthful, he smirked, then started snickering uncontrollably. What the fuck did he do to my food? FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2013 at 1:34pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, l grounded my 17-year-old son from his computer because of his terrible attitude towards his homework. As payback, he convinced my 5-year-old daughter that if she goes to sleep, she'll never wake up. I now have a hysterical and sleepless child to deal with. FML

by PIGaming / 10/28/2013 at 1:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2013 at 12:08pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML

by -__-" / 09/29/2013 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at Walmart with my stepmom. We were about to check out when a little sweet-looking old woman came up and asked if she could get in front of us. Seeing as she only had two items in her hands we said yes. Her husband then came up with two carts full of stuff, condoms on top. FML

by sommmerrrr / 09/15/2013 at 12:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was talking to my husband about our favorite TV show, when he took my face in his hands and sweetly whispered, "You're so pretty. Why must you ruin it with words?" FML

by sammieshortcake / 09/14/2013 at 11:30am / United States / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.