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itsjohannna

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itsjohannna

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  • Number of visits : 983
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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itsjohannna's page activity

Visits<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:43pm<b>DFizzlio</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:11pm<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 3:01am<b>thatrandomchick2</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 10:51pm<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 2:21pm<b>moonlightknight</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 3:00pm<b>emxy92</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 10:01am<b>smartypants9</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 11:19pm<b>Mylyfesuxs</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 4:14pm<b>dman1997</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 6:42pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 4:12pm<b>ClaireWinchester</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 4:34pm

itsjohannna's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of itsjohannna's badges

itsjohannna's favorite FMLs

Today, I went back to work after a vacation, only to find out I'll soon be forced to dress up as one of the princesses from Frozen to promote our store. FML

#21221108
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35795) - you deserved it (5194)

On 07/26/2014 at 12:29pm - work - by PrincessPromotion (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I lost my wedding ring at work. It wouldn't be too hard to track down, except that I work at Heinz. If you find it in your mayonnaise, keep it. FML

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I went on a date with an extremely cute girl. About 30 minutes in, she excused herself to the restroom. I waited for about 20 minutes, then I got up and left. About 10 minutes later, she called asking where I was. FML

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38702) - you deserved it (19768)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38179) - you deserved it (6393)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

#21216984
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31509) - you deserved it (22573)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:55am - intimacy - by teegtwo (woman) - United States

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

#21206177
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39786) - you deserved it (6084)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm - health - by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49601) - you deserved it (6572)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41227) - you deserved it (2991)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to see the school counselor to schedule my classes for school. She asked me if I knew how to speak English. My parents are Chinese and I don't even know how to speak Chinese. I've lived in America my whole life. Plus, I even spoke to her in English to ask about classes. FML

#21200980
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43930) - you deserved it (3407)

On 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51163) - you deserved it (7676)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45995) - you deserved it (14176)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, I was showing the guy I like something on my phone. My period tracking app decided it was the perfect time to tell me that I need to stock up on tampons, because I'm getting my period tomorrow. FML

#21197391
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42952) - you deserved it (7845)

On 07/03/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by blood buddies - United States (Massachusetts)



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