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itsbuckyb's favorite FMLs
Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML
by Noslo / 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML
by roadkill0321 / 11/07/2011 at 2:20am / United States / Love
Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML
by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous
Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML
by tommyboy783 / 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by Andrew / 10/11/2011 at 9:11pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML
by DyingPlants / 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, a friend from work threw a party. We each had to dress up as a deceased celebrity. I thought it'd be a perfect time to dress up as Marilyn Monroe. When I arrived to the party, my boss said, "But... Rosie O'Donnell isn't dead." FML
by theonlychildd1 / 08/02/2011 at 7:46pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML
by hatemylife / 07/19/2011 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Kids
by ashleyrae / 06/29/2011 at 10:55am / United States (Mississippi) / Miscellaneous
by MakeMyDay_27 / 06/27/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
Today, I went to a concert with my boyfriend. I was repeatedly ass-grabbed, grinded on and hit on by guys. My boyfriend's response was, "As long as they continue to bring you free beer, let them get a little feel of what they are paying for." FML
by unknown / 06/15/2011 at 6:20am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML
by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money
by romantic84 / 05/31/2011 at 12:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Whatdididowrong? / 05/10/2011 at 1:18am / Kids
by spartanson / 04/28/2011 at 6:28am / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…