Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

itsame0987

Offline (the 08/17/2014 at 5:57pm) | Search for a member

itsame0987

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3278
  • Number of comments : 119
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About itsame0987 : I am very opinionated, and love to debate. I am a computer and video game nerd. My favorite game is Madden (any version).

To my friends, family, and coworkers I am known as the queen of random facts. I love to study everything, and am currently working on learning more about cars. I would love to be able to do my own work on my car so I don't have to go to the mechanic to fix problems with it.

I am a die-hard football fan, part of being born and raised in Alabama, and I say Roll Tide. I watch so many games every week that I pick up on tendencies of teams and by the middle of the season I can pretty well tell what plays they are going to run based on the formation and situation in the game. (Yes I am that obsessed)

I am taken, and am in the best relationship I have ever been in. Anything else you want to know just ask.

itsame0987's page activity

Visits<b>paintedwings12</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 8:04am<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 11:53pm<b>scott1092</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:47am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm<b>agent4442</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 11:25pm<b>airca101</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 10:57pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 6:46am<b>shucks101</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 8:39pm<b>Sporky13</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 1:27am<b>SuperPizzaMan</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 4:55am<b>Exotic_Nihilism</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 9:07am<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:27pm<b>strawberrywine22</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 4:54am<b>flupsht</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 7:14am<b>tralala453</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 9:35pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 2:39pm<b>SilverInGray</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 6:20pm<b>Nicole1225</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 4:55am

itsame0987's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of itsame0987's badges

itsame0987's favorite FMLs

Today, my entire family came over for thanksgiving. It went pretty well, only four family members got in a fist fight and only one cop car was called. FML

#18341850
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24274) - you deserved it (1891)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by guy - United States

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

#18334722
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28251) - you deserved it (3696)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:35am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my dad got drunk and thought it would be a great idea to clean up the yard by dumping gasoline all over the leaves and lighting our entire front yard on fire. FML

#18334271
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27558) - you deserved it (2258)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by JWhite - United States (California)

Today, I was jogging around the neighborhood when I went past a bar. There were lots of drunk men outside telling me to come over so they could give me the night of my life. One of those men was my grandpa. FML

#18329245
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42431) - you deserved it (2921)

On 11/23/2011 at 5:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34286) - you deserved it (6021)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12524) - you deserved it (56819)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12524) - you deserved it (56819)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

#18254256
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26054) - you deserved it (15465)

On 11/15/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by yuck - United Kingdom (Bolton)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28174) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

#18098889
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21454) - you deserved it (9575)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by ricksterile - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally found out where my great grandmother's antique handheld mirror disappeared to. According to the headmaster, my eleven year old son has been using it to look up his classmates' dresses at school. FML

#18095275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24352) - you deserved it (2847)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:25am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks vapor rub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

#18080795
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27067) - you deserved it (6756)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:35pm - health - by lanikai610 - United States

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27001) - you deserved it (32383)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14919) - you deserved it (58114)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16914) - you deserved it (30702)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: