About itsalanis : I'm Alan. Some people like to nickname me Alanis instead.
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
itsalanis's favorite FMLs
by FullOfNick / 09/10/2011 at 3:11am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/09/2011 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health
by CHStennis_4 / 09/03/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Utah) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/31/2011 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy
Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML
by mystupidson / 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
Today, I was on a train when we hit and killed a person. We were stalled for 4 hours. The guy sitting next to me asked what I did for a living, so I told him that I'm a vet tech. Then he showed me his infected elbow. FML
by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 10:51am / United States / Transportation
by Ariella / 08/29/2011 at 12:06am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by momma6126 / 08/25/2011 at 12:47am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by lonely / 08/23/2011 at 12:49pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy
Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML
by MissCan'tKeepAJob / 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by vishuzzbabe77 / 08/22/2011 at 2:04am / United States / Animals
by boyfriend123 / 08/18/2011 at 6:02am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 10:29am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by nomorecookies / 08/06/2011 at 1:53am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML
by Username / 08/05/2011 at 10:05am / United States / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, I was talking to a boy I'm interested in and tried to make conversation while taking a sip… Today, I went over to my crush's house for the first time. Everything was going great until his dog… Today, I was at drama club, rehearsing for a play I'm in. But I had to leave early and so I went up…