About itsa_maddy : Most of my life scenarios are "fml" so this is by far my favorite website!
itsa_maddy's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
itsa_maddy's favorite FMLs
by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML
by Aaron Lewis / 07/07/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by Dammit / 07/07/2012 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Health
Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML
by wife of a shithead / 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm / Norway (Oslo) / Love
Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML
by Julie is in pain / 07/06/2012 at 1:11pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, as always, I have a very weak stomach. I'm in Japan right now, and all the unfamiliar foods set me off every time I eat. I can choose between having a great time and starving myself half to death, or sitting in my hotel room all day with stomach pains and diarrhea. FML
by Anonymous / 07/06/2012 at 12:04pm / Japan (Tokyo) / Health
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
by Anonymous / 07/06/2012 at 6:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 10:13pm / United States / Work
by lazy pregnant girl / 07/05/2012 at 3:34pm / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by tagteam / 07/05/2012 at 12:30pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 9:38am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, while taking the trash out, the old cranky elevator in my apartment complex finally gave up on life. For a long hour I was stuck between floors 4 and 5, practically embracing my bio-waste can. FML
by Kazenoe / 07/05/2012 at 7:52am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
by notestojenn / 07/04/2012 at 10:55pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 2:01pm / United States / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…