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ispeakspanish

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ispeakspanish

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  • Number of visits : 625
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ispeakspanish's page activity

Visits<b>ekimen</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 6:40am<b>CHUBBYninja</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:27pm<b>TheLawsOfGravity</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:27pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 9:38am<b>Moonlightring</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 3:02am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 8:40am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 7:11pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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ispeakspanish's favorite FMLs

Today, after finally finishing a huge internal rebranding project at work, which I've poured blood, sweat and tears into over the last 12 months, I found out we're being acquired by another company and that our new brand will no longer exist. FML

#21319043
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17053) - you deserved it (1104)

On 12/17/2014 at 8:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23580) - you deserved it (4569)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

#21318238
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25738) - you deserved it (2960)

On 12/15/2014 at 10:38pm - kids - by Lisa - United States (Missouri)

Today, my classmate said I looked better without makeup. Well, her exact words were, "You look like less of a whore without makeup." FML

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML

#21317613
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26568) - you deserved it (4672)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:22pm - love - by lonesome - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30369) - you deserved it (3298)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's been months since I dropped out of college to escape constantly being bullied and being miserable. Ever since then, I've been having recurring nightmares with the same people bullying me, after which I wake up crying and feeling miserable. My brain is a douchebag. FML

#21317204
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28500) - you deserved it (3876)

On 12/14/2014 at 6:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29508) - you deserved it (2383)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML

#21316969
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (3482)

On 12/13/2014 at 8:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she's been cheating on me for the past two months. Apparently she thought I'd take it well, because when I yelled at her for being a heartless bitch, she stuttered "S-sike!" and tried to play it off as a prank. She's acting like we're still dating. FML

#21316716
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29702) - you deserved it (2395)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML

#21316711
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25234) - you deserved it (4690)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:03am - intimacy - by giantcuntflaps (woman) - Australia

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32626) - you deserved it (4086)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML

#21315641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24523) - you deserved it (5243)

On 12/11/2014 at 2:55pm - misc - by not laughing anymore - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26002) - you deserved it (3149)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)



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