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islandgirly

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islandgirly

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3437
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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islandgirly's page activity

Visits<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:50am<b>YellowKettleBell</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 11:57pm<b>Rndmtsk</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 1:32pm<b>sCrEaMiNgToAsT</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:18am<b>blackpuddle</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 6:46pm<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 06/17/2010 at 7:55am<b>fisheatsbear</b> - the 06/13/2010 at 1:06am

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islandgirly's favorite FMLs

Today, my wedding ring went missing. Later, my 3-year-old came to me crying, he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off, he peed on me. FML

#20108644
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35554) - you deserved it (3668)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:53am - kids - by anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

#20099894
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35897) - you deserved it (4871)

On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at around 11pm the police made a visit to my house, explaining how my neighbors had thought I was using a universal remote to change their television channels. FML

#20099119
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23972) - you deserved it (1415)

On 10/02/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, someone stole the massive pumpkin I've been painstakingly growing all year. What did they do with it? They put it in the middle of a busy intersection. FML

#20098412
122 comments

Today, I was waiting for my wife in a mall when some kids came and sat near me, wearing band t-shirts. I recognized some, as I was into The Smiths and Black Flag in my youth. I tried to strike up a music-fan chat with them. "Fuck off, grandad" and "Ew, pedo" is all I got in return. FML

#20087854
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24433) - you deserved it (4313)

On 09/25/2012 at 7:54am - kids - by HenryRollinsForPresident (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62557) - you deserved it (3319)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

#20071176
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37807) - you deserved it (2337)

On 09/14/2012 at 1:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

#20067208
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18760) - you deserved it (2257)

On 09/11/2012 at 2:47am - misc - by NotDrunk (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20547) - you deserved it (49068)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

#20045566
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30032) - you deserved it (5739)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

#20027025
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34646) - you deserved it (1612)

On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML

Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

#20017485
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24068) - you deserved it (2395)

On 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm - kids - by JAdams (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, some guy asked me if he could borrow my lighter. I said "of course," reached into my handbag, and gave him the lighter. He stared at me for a few seconds until I realised I'd given him a tampax. FML

#20011526
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23898) - you deserved it (6130)

On 08/09/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by mary - United Kingdom

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

#20011233
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (3477)

On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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