isis_morrigan

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Offline (the 10/29/2014 at 4:57pm)

isis_morrigan

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 6 August 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2141
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About isis_morrigan : i'm a pretty easy going person, and open minded. i rarely get on the actual site, usually use the app on my phone, so if u message me and i don't respond, i'm not ignoring u! lol, i just haven't gotten on. the best bet if u'd like to talk, email me at isis_morrigan@yahoo.com, i enjoy talking to new people! oh and if you couldnt tell, I love tattoos!

isis_morrigan's page activity

Visits<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 4:57am<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 11:51pm<b>ethanwilliams13</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 3:57pm<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 3:29pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 10:51pm<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:53am<b>LPac5295</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 10:08am<b>heybro19</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:15am<b>leaannec30</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 12:55pm<b>JavitheWrestler</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 10:07pm<b>shain1988</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 3:46pm<b>LuluRichards</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 4:13am<b>wvcheesehead1</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 11:40pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:29pm<b>joco4</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:01pm<b>boeglie</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:05pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 12:37pm<b>valleus</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 12:03pm

Fucked!<b>shain1988</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:46pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 5:48pm

isis_morrigan's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of isis_morrigan's badges

isis_morrigan's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

by Heather / 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, maintenance came to fix the constantly beeping alarm system near my apartment. They changed it from beeping on-and-off to one never-ending beep, similar to the sound of my sanity flat-lining. FML

by tcm123 / 10/29/2012 at 12:31am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, the pharmacist warned me that my antibiotics might cause slight gastrointestinal distress. The fact that I have been on the john for the past 90 minutes drenched in sweat would lead me to believe our definitions of "slight" are a bit different. FML

by jdch_99 / 08/29/2012 at 9:12am / United States / Health

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

by justlittleoldme / 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2012 at 3:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

by anonymus / 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML

by Badchristian / 04/05/2012 at 12:17am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

by woohoo420 / 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

by screaming monkey / 04/04/2012 at 6:13am / United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead) / Health

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

by Username / 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm / India / Kids

Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML

by RatFailure / 01/11/2012 at 12:23am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's the last day of finals week. Unfortunately the only test I've passed this week is the pregnancy test I took during my lunch break in a Subway bathroom. FML

by LogicalMolly / 12/13/2011 at 12:16am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2011 at 6:54pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals