About isallwaysme : Time to show the real me. I've been hiding under the mask for too long. First thing, I really enjoy 2 sports; Speedball (speedball>woodsball but woodsball isnt bad) and freestyle skiing. Thats my life. In the summer Im all bruised and bloody, and in the winter im all bruised and bloody. Im not sure why i do it, its just really fun. Secondly, i get A LOT of injuries. Im from Canada, I have an amazing girlfriend. My motto; Go hard or go home.
isallwaysme's FML badges
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
isallwaysme's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (New York) / Health
by adam / 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I ran into a former college classmate at Subway. He gushed on and on about how I was the only one in our class with true potential. Then I asked him what kind of sandwich he wanted, because 3 years out of college, Subway is still the only place that will hire a music major. FML
by Prodigy / 02/11/2010 at 9:07am / United States (Tennessee) / Work
Today, I was developing film at walmart. It started to get a little warm, so I began taking off my sweatshirt. This creepy old man approaches me, saying "You know, usually girls like you are paid to take their clothes off." FML
by hotandbothered / 02/03/2010 at 1:24am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML
by boner / 02/01/2010 at 3:51pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
Today, I sliced my finger open because my roommate's girlfriend put a broken ceramic plate in the recycling. I was putting some paper in the bin and all of a sudden, an inch and a half of my flesh is naked to the world. I don't have medical insurance, so I fixed it with superglue. FML
by Anonymous / 02/01/2010 at 12:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by sexyfail / 01/26/2010 at 3:59am / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy
by masterzach21 / 01/22/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
by NYCguy / 01/19/2010 at 10:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/17/2010 at 8:44am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a text from my crush. In my clumsy attempt to quickly grab the phone, I knocked it off the kitchen counter and cracked the screen. After driving to my friends house so I could put my sim card in her phone, I saw that the text said "who's this? stop texting me." FML
by Desperate_measures / 01/16/2010 at 7:22am / Greece (Attiki) / Love
Today, I locked my keys in my car and called AAA. He got out to take a look at my car, and he locked himself out of his own car with his tools inside. It took us 40 minutes with a screwdriver and stick to unlock his car and 40 seconds to unlock mine after. 9 hours later, I found my extra key. FML
by Dani / 01/12/2010 at 4:51pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Transportation
Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML
by Anonymous / 01/11/2010 at 9:25pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I come home for lunch. I see a sandwich on the table with a note saying "I hope we can have a healthy new relationship, Love, Carissa." I see another note from my girlfriend next to it saying "I hope you enjoy your new relationship with Carissa." Carissa is my new step mother. FML
by SingleWorker / 01/08/2010 at 10:45pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…