Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

isallwaysme

Search for a member

isallwaysme

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10719
  • Number of comments : 385
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About isallwaysme : Time to show the real me. I've been hiding under the mask for too long. First thing, I really enjoy 2 sports; Speedball (speedball>woodsball but woodsball isnt bad) and freestyle skiing. Thats my life. In the summer Im all bruised and bloody, and in the winter im all bruised and bloody. Im not sure why i do it, its just really fun. Secondly, i get A LOT of injuries. Im from Canada, I have an amazing girlfriend. My motto; Go hard or go home.

isallwaysme's page activity

Visits<b>Fobster06</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:33am<b>just_killin_time</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 8:10pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 3:50pm<b>jinsy</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 6:58pm<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:41am<b>Kitcat1234</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:59pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 11:20am<b>Paulcs</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 9:52pm<b>simmybaby_</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 11:12am<b>GeorgeWhiteOP</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:09pm<b>2nd</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 7:10pm<b>llamingo</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 6:04pm<b>david_4197</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 3:50pm<b>Pike313</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:02pm<b>Kaoticlol</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 3:25pm<b>SychoticFML</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 7:17pm<b>Twisted_Killjoy</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 6:42pm<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 7:54am

Fucked!<b>Twisted_Killjoy</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:42am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:30pm

isallwaysme's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of isallwaysme's badges

isallwaysme's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking to bed in fancy panties and a tight black tank top. My husband exclaimed, "This is the best part about being a grown up!" He was talking about the ice cream he was eating in bed. FML

#14698486
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31990) - you deserved it (4545)

On 01/24/2011 at 2:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18261) - you deserved it (44278) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

#14583340
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16948) - you deserved it (79362)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

#14518129
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28769) - you deserved it (5504)

On 01/09/2011 at 5:18am - intimacy - by S - Singapore

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71776) - you deserved it (3840)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother came over again to help me work on my Student Aid application. She also brought over the savings bonds that she has been accumulating since I was born to help pay for college. Turns out they won't reach maturity until I'm thirty. She never bothered to check out this fact. I'm screwed for college. FML

#14476476
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24831) - you deserved it (3178)

On 01/05/2011 at 5:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out my identity was stolen. The person got credit cards in my name and didn't pay the bills, which has ruined my near perfect credit. The worst part about all of this is that I can't turn the person in. It's my mom, and sending her to jail wouldn't really work out for anyone. FML

#14471817
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40117) - you deserved it (4936)

On 01/05/2011 at 4:01am - money - by wdavi022 -

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

#14396481
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44881) - you deserved it (3485)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

#14386924
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47189) - you deserved it (9406)

On 12/29/2010 at 9:12pm - misc - by ihateteenagers (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a text just before class that my partner didn't finish their half of our 30 page research paper because "That class is stupid". FML

#14213516
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36751) - you deserved it (3758)

On 12/15/2010 at 3:11pm - work - by sam - United States

Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML

#14208425
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28222) - you deserved it (9674)

On 12/14/2010 at 11:24pm - animals - by fufu_mutt (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to leave my one-night stand in my flat because I was giving a guest lecture at the local university. Halfway through, I hear someone sneaking in so I jokingly asked if they had a 'wild night out.' It was the guy I slept with. FML

#14119620
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12202) - you deserved it (39256)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by openmouthinsertfoot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML

#14114880
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32258) - you deserved it (5136)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:25am - love - by 1fungi -

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58671) - you deserved it (10033)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36776) - you deserved it (9833)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: