About isallwaysme : Time to show the real me. I've been hiding under the mask for too long. First thing, I really enjoy 2 sports; Speedball (speedball>woodsball but woodsball isnt bad) and freestyle skiing. Thats my life. In the summer Im all bruised and bloody, and in the winter im all bruised and bloody. Im not sure why i do it, its just really fun. Secondly, i get A LOT of injuries. Im from Canada, I have an amazing girlfriend. My motto; Go hard or go home.
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isallwaysme's favorite FMLs
Today, I was cleaning my bathroom, and accidentally spilled bleach, ruining my shower curtain, rugs, and towels. While attempting to wipe up the bleach, I knocked over a bottle of shower cleaner. It read, "WARNING: DO NOT MIX WITH BLEACH." I still can't go in the house. FML
by troublewithbleach / 04/05/2011 at 9:52pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a band concert with 500 other people. The song they were performing stopped, and I loved it so much I stood up and clapped. Everyone stared, while I slowly realized the song wasn't over. FML
by RedFace / 04/05/2011 at 10:06am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized I don't know which is sadder: the fact I have detailed conversations with myself in my car, or that I bought a Bluetooth earpiece so that I can do it in public without people thinking I'm a complete lunatic. FML
by shelby / 03/30/2011 at 12:54am / United States / Health
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
by -_- / 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/26/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I have no cell phone reception as I am visiting family who lives on the side of a mountain. They told me there was service on top of the mountain, so I hiked up. Only when I got there did I realize I'd left my phone back down at the house. FML
by nooooo / 03/16/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was telling my students that it's unnecessary to put arrows on the bottom of the page to tell me there's work on the back, I check it anyway. At the end of the day, at least 6 kids came up to me asking to change their grade because I forgot to grade the back. They hadn't put arrows. FML
by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 8:52pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
by Dilly_20 / 02/22/2011 at 1:00pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by 5minsolder / 02/07/2011 at 8:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML
by missbrit / 02/04/2011 at 2:59am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Intimacy
Today, I came home from a vacation. It had snowed, so I decided to shovel the front walk. While shoveling, I found a dead skunk frozen solid on the sidewalk. I tried to pick it up with my shovel, but it stuck. It won't move 'til the ice melts. FML
by theyreallydosmell / 02/03/2011 at 7:59pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss called me Ashley. My name doesn't even start with an A. I even wear a name tag. You would think after nearly four years, your boss would remember your name. Every time he speaks to me, it's a different name. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2011 at 12:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, while on holiday in Morocco, I got arrested by a cop. “Sir, you were driving at 90 instead…