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ironik69

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ironik69
  • Town/Country : Dallas, U.S.A
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 July 1984 (29 years)
  • Number of visits : 692
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ironik69 : You're the boss, and I'm nobody. Therefore, you are the boss of nobody. :D

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ironik69's favorite FMLs

Today, while working, I thought, "I wish my kittens could text so I can talk to them throughout the day." And then I realized, I'm that cat lady you read about. FML

#20532138
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27359) - you deserved it (10981)

On 03/05/2013 at 11:13am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my boyfriend told me I was selfish for "choosing" to start my period on his day off from work. FML

#20531170
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43285) - you deserved it (3996)

On 03/04/2013 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by Thankshun (woman) - United States

Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML

#20530533
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36499) - you deserved it (9001)

On 03/04/2013 at 2:36am - love - by married to wonder woman (man) - United States (California)

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33588) - you deserved it (11180)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML

#20527973
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40174) - you deserved it (18423)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:32am - animals - by yikes - United States

Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML

#20527434
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (5974)

On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

#20527203
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58181) - you deserved it (5071)

On 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by sn-511 (man) - Italy (Campania)

Today, after working out at the gym, I went to grab my bag, and realized that my phone was missing. Panicking, I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, and dialed my mom's number to tell her I'd lost it. It took me until the last ring to realize what I was doing. FML

#20526546
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9995) - you deserved it (34997)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

#20526049
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25855) - you deserved it (8493)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML

#20525408
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28738) - you deserved it (2495)

On 02/28/2013 at 5:56am - misc - by sickofthesmelltoo (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 20-year-old daughter staggered into my room at two in the morning, drunker than I ever thought a person could be, screaming for me to make pancakes for her. FML

#20524572
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29408) - you deserved it (6489)

On 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Ugh (woman) - United Kingdom



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