Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ireply_wlyrics

Offline (24 hours ago) | Search for a member

ireply_wlyrics

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 20399
  • Number of comments : 645
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About ireply_wlyrics : hi
well, I would love to live in another county for a while, maybe help impoverished children and families learn languages and cultures
, and become a teacher for elementary/middle school. it'll be tough. no doubt but hey, teaching in itself is a learning process and even if I make mistakes, it's all about learning from them and adjusting to be a better teacher and in the long run, and to think creatively & freely and question authority rather then just have information drilled into their skulls. and to stand against bullied! never take their ***!
i'm female, and about 5'2 .
NOT the original ireplywlyrics....not allowed to reply with lyrics now.... wish I could change my name....
Whatever you do. don't make assumptions,
don't turn on the lights.
and don't turn around.





Betre å vite rett enn å håpe feil

wanna know more bout me, message!~~

ireply_wlyrics's page activity

Visits<b>cocainewhore</b> - 11 hours ago<b>Stegosaurus314</b> - 19 hours ago<b>markcallanan_</b> - yesterday at 3:36am<b>kaet</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:32am<b>Le_Rabbid</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:40pm<b>RandomHavoc1</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 11:44pm<b>alaen23</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 1:33pm<b>VengeanceChicken</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:53am<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 11:56pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:15pm<b>redwoods</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:22pm<b>facelick</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:59am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 4:04am<b>murphy30011</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 11:31am<b>KapralCat</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 4:04am<b>IconicFML</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:29am<b>Pumpkinx8</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:39pm<b>historynerd22</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:52am

ireply_wlyrics's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ireply_wlyrics's badges

ireply_wlyrics's favorite FMLs

Today, while shopping with my mother, she handed me a frozen turkey to put in the cart, but ended up swinging it into my nuts instead. I feel like a giant battered eggplant, and I think I'm now impotent. FML

#8774277
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19397) - you deserved it (2932)

On 03/02/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by beateneggs - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that there's nothing like having to chase a 100-something lb. Bloodhound around the neighborhood when you're 8 months pregnant, with a 3 and 4 year old in tow. Especially when she runs the other way at the sight of you coming. FML

#8769098
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25292) - you deserved it (3733)

On 03/02/2010 at 7:17am - kids - by Dogs loose - Sent from mobile version

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML

#8712644
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23658) - you deserved it (2180)

On 02/28/2010 at 6:16am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my abusive, obsessive, psychotic ex-boyfriend from over two years ago still has a thing for me. How did I find out? Although I've ignored him walking unnecessarily past my house for the past two months, it was hard to ignore when he fell from a tree outside my window. FML

#8704782
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34157) - you deserved it (2414)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:30pm - love - by sacrophage (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I brought my best friend to my uncle's birthday party. We were having a great time until my grandmother walked up to us and said to me, "You sure have a nice looking boyfriend." My friend is a girl. She has cancer and lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy. FML

#8690586
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37217) - you deserved it (1954)

On 02/27/2010 at 2:03pm - health - by hairplease (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss told me that if I didn't become his neighbor on Farmville I wouldn't have a job. I laughed. He didn't. FML

#8687121
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28726) - you deserved it (2427)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:07am - work - by Anon - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML

#8687085
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24945) - you deserved it (2689)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

#8680968
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22127) - you deserved it (2703)

On 02/27/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend came to visit me. He told me he was cheating on me, and that he wanted to break up. I was so angry that as he left, I started screaming at him out of my second story apartment window. I picked up a huge potted plant and shoved it through the window at him. It missed my ex and hit my car. FML

#8646489
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12063) - you deserved it (40824)

On 02/25/2010 at 7:33pm - love - by MUemma (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

#8638968
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39782) - you deserved it (2366)

On 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by grossuncle (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to throw out the garbage outside. I noticed at the bottom of my can was a lot of rice. I was angry at my brother for making a mess. As I went to clean it up, the rice moved. It wasn't rice, it was maggots. FML

#8634808
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23087) - you deserved it (4000)

On 02/25/2010 at 6:46am - misc - by SayWhat (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26768) - you deserved it (5243)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

#8565371
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24401) - you deserved it (6689)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10318) - you deserved it (39212)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: