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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
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Today, my boyfriend threw me into his pool. I had my phone and iPod in my pockets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28684) - you deserved it (3631)
On 06/25/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by pod (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, the man next to me was feeding the birds when he ran out of food. We were at Adventure Island and there were "Do not feed the birds" signs everywhere. The birds then became aggressive and started savaging the both of us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21857) - you deserved it (3178)
On 06/25/2011 at 3:41pm - animals - by kk (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25537) - you deserved it (3691)
On 06/25/2011 at 10:21am - misc - by woahheylex - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14090) - you deserved it (46349)
On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36455) - you deserved it (1918)
Today, my school year book awarded "cutest couple" to my boyfriend and I. We broke up yesterday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34222) - you deserved it (3755)
On 06/25/2011 at 12:31am - love - by yearbook369 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while walking home I was jumped by two guys, one of whom shouted, "You shouldn't have run your mouth off, Rick!" My name is John. Only after they repeatedly axe-kicked me in the chest did they realize their mistake. It now hurts to breathe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33227) - you deserved it (2129)
On 06/24/2011 at 7:58pm - misc - by John - United States (California)
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32494) - you deserved it (2892)
On 06/24/2011 at 7:36pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Devon)
Today, I found out that when my room-mate agreed to babysit someone's two year old kid for money, what he really planned on doing was dumping it with me. The kid won't stop crying and screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22356) - you deserved it (3152)
On 06/24/2011 at 6:11pm - kids - by Username - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my daughter was charged with multiple counts of vandalism and trespassing. It seems she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night, stealing and breaking our neighbors' lawn ornaments. Specifically garden gnomes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20613) - you deserved it (5217)
On 06/24/2011 at 5:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out how it feels to have my groin catch fire due to a magic trick going wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20249) - you deserved it (9009)
Today, one of my students corrected the problem I had solved on the board, explaining that you do multiplication before subtraction. I teach the second grade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8445) - you deserved it (43005)
On 06/24/2011 at 2:47am - work - by gutav indogop - Switzerland (Aargau)
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29469) - you deserved it (3454)
On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I dislocated my collarbone while trying remove my bra without taking off my shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14112) - you deserved it (23131)
On 06/23/2011 at 11:01pm - health - by Ali (New York) - United States (New York)
Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9298) - you deserved it (28421)
On 06/23/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by gypsy - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 20 May 2013
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