ipwnallmen

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Offline (the 01/14/2014 at 8:45pm)

ipwnallmen

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8141
  • Number of comments : 296
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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ipwnallmen's page activity

Visits<b>Ultigmr</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 2:07pm<b>lone_ninja</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 5:01pm<b>alexjoseph5575</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 10:03am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:58pm<b>ChocoTaco12344</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 10:55pm<b>seanlapree</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:22am<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 11:47pm<b>baxwar</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 11:20pm<b>will_5801</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 10:36pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:58pm

ipwnallmen's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of ipwnallmen's badges

ipwnallmen's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML

by gottalovefriends / 04/23/2012 at 12:04am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, I found out why my girlfriend comes over for dinner so often. She thinks my dad is a real babe. FML

by jack / 04/22/2012 at 10:43pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML

by penny-dropping / 04/16/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Animals

Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML

by jonasister / 04/15/2012 at 2:43pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

by Scabby / 04/11/2012 at 5:53am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Health

Today, I found out about my old school's class reunion, which I wasn't invited to. Everyone has my number and e-mail address. They just "forgot" to tell me. FML

by Girl-with-the-glasses / 04/11/2012 at 3:34am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the side walk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

by sydstreet / 04/09/2012 at 1:31am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, the mouse trap I set in my kitchen worked. I caught a snake. FML

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was adjusting my nose piercing from the inside. My mother saw and thought I was picking my nose, so she slapped my hand away, tearing my nose ring out in the process. FML

by ouchouchouch / 03/28/2012 at 12:16am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML

by ohhdear.___. / 03/26/2012 at 10:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my mother told me it's okay to be a prostitute, as long as I make sure the clients pay a lot. FML

by Teenagegirl / 03/26/2012 at 12:11am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

by Anonymous / 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

by PicklesMcRaptor / 03/25/2012 at 7:59am / United States (Florida) / Animals