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iop3300

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iop3300
  • Town/Country : somewhere, Nowhere
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 846
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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iop3300's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I have a kidney infection. Now I'm forced to drink at least 4 glasses of water before going to bed. I also have to be woken up every two hours to be told to, "GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!" by my mother. FML

#19520981
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22008) - you deserved it (1724)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:50am - health - by hottygirl905 - United States (Florida)

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27255) - you deserved it (2369)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14686) - you deserved it (25577)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML

#19450814
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18301) - you deserved it (1237)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML

#19404370
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28498) - you deserved it (1831)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:40pm - misc - by Eliza - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML

#19352692
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16317) - you deserved it (2934)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States

Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML

#19253868
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8314) - you deserved it (133493)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my landlady roasted a joint of beef and the whole house smelled wonderful. OK, even if I am a masochistic vegetarian and former omnivore, that was way beyond cruel. FML

#19152969
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6076) - you deserved it (24460)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:28am - misc - by i2xl (woman) - Canada

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29099) - you deserved it (3151)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

#18764509
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22010) - you deserved it (5617)

On 01/10/2012 at 4:36am - intimacy - by eakthegeek - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

#18744677
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42073) - you deserved it (36794)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19011) - you deserved it (37894)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML

#18714264
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31359) - you deserved it (1543)

On 01/05/2012 at 6:43am - money - by cazorp (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

#18689614
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41335) - you deserved it (2995)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

#18670300
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26411) - you deserved it (2970)

On 01/01/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by Scarred4Life - United States (Maryland)



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