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  • Number of visits : 175
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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insert_name_herr's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

#20007279
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20963) - you deserved it (2191)

On 08/07/2012 at 5:19am - health - by TheCerealKiller - United States (California)

Today, I had a violent sneezing attack while changing my phone's password and now I have no idea what it could be. FML

#19911414
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26445) - you deserved it (4175)

On 07/08/2012 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

#19775676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27021) - you deserved it (2666)

On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML

#19566407
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19243) - you deserved it (2150)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

#18984075
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36429) - you deserved it (4472)

On 02/03/2012 at 1:29pm - animals - by deadhamster - United States

Today, my mother-in-law moved into my wife's two-bedroom apartment. She's quite possibly the reincarnation of Hitler himself, and she'll be staying until this time next year. FML

#18797635
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (2047)

On 01/13/2012 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML

#18795817
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21307) - you deserved it (1999)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML

#18101830
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28404) - you deserved it (1956)

On 10/29/2011 at 7:02am - animals - by Noname - United States

Today, at work, I heard a weird sound coming from the ceiling. As I looked up to see what it was, a huge splash of water hit me in the face. I called mall maintenance to let them know. They told me they already knew about the leak... from the sewage line. FML

#17621192
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26520) - you deserved it (1940)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - work - by honeybee2487 - United States

Today, I realized burying my dog underneath our swing-set was a bad idea. My two sons are now scarred for life. FML

#17364695
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7951) - you deserved it (44264)

On 08/04/2011 at 6:19am - kids - by Bobsaget00 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML

#17302566
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28159) - you deserved it (17028)

On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, someone came over and told my mother, "I'm your son's friend Morris, I need to get something out of his car", so she gave him the keys. I have no friend called Morris, and now I don't have a sound system either. FML

#17266001
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36661) - you deserved it (2981)

On 07/26/2011 at 9:35am - misc - by ceetee - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad was given 2 VIP tickets to see my favourite band in concert next week. You can now find them on eBay. FML

#16560857
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36989) - you deserved it (3752)

On 06/08/2011 at 10:51am - misc - by cheersdaddy (woman) - United Kingdom (Midlothian)

Today, while shopping, I was grabbed and dragged off to a security room with no warning. Apparently, the way I was dressed and walking was suspicious. FML

#15607773
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28086) - you deserved it (4581)

On 04/02/2011 at 5:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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